Some people say that art subjects such as music, drama and creative writing era an essential part of education, and every school should include them in its syllabus. Do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give your opinion and examples form your own experience.

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There is an argument whether the government should adopt an approach to add

art

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subjects

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to the syllabus as an essential part of the curriculum or not. In my opinion,

art

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subjects

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are same important as academic

subjects

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such

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as mathematics, physics, and science. I strongly agree with

this

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statement and I will examine it. On the one hand, studying

art

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leads to fostering creativity which is crucial for problem-solving in real life.

For instance

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, recent studies advocate the theory that people who play music or write creative books have a better mindset to solve the problems in their lives. Since mathematics is able to improve your brain and is necessary for every age group,

art

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also

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as important to solve problems in the real world.

Therefore

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, every school have to emphasise

art

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subjects

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alongside other academic

subjects

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On the other hand

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, not all students have the same talent in specific

subjects

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that the school determined, and some pupils will probably do other work except engineering or science.

Art

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education can lead to opportunities in various career paths in the creative industry.

For instance

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, some artists not only make more money than doctors, but they are

also

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more famous than other majors.

Thus

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, if schools add

art

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subjects

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to their syllabus, it might give them more chances to the student for their future profession. In conclusion, every school program must include

art

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subjects

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and the government should value that.

Art

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subjects

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not only improve their creativity, it give them more chances to students to have various occupation paths.

shahab.aWed May 29 2024

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grammar

Be cautious of minor grammatical errors. For example, 'art subjects are same important as...' should be 'art subjects are as important as...','every school have to emphasise' should be 'every school has to emphasise.' Small errors can slightly affect readability.

examples

Expand on key points with more relevant specific examples. The current examples are good but more concrete illustrations will strengthen the argument. For example, include real-life examples of schools known for their successful arts programs and how it has benefitted students.

response

The essay provides a clear and comprehensive response to the task with a strong viewpoint expressed from the beginning.

structure

The logical structure is fairly well-organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.

content

The importance of arts subjects in fostering creativity and various career opportunities is well-addressed.

7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

259 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

foster creativity
problem-solving
emotional intelligence
holistic development
academic-oriented curriculum
diverse learning styles
inclusive education
career paths
creative industry
public speaking skills

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Some people say that art subjects such as music, drama and creative writing era an essential part of education, and every school should include them in its syllabus. Do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give your opinion and examples form your own experience.

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Some people feel that the private lives of celebrities should not be openly shared by the media. To what extent do you agree or disagree

Full-time university students spend much of their time on study. Some people think it is essential for them to take other activities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some experts believe that when a country is already rich, any additional increase in economic wealth does not make its citizens any more satisfied. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people say history is one the most important school subjects. Other people think that, in today's world, subjects like science and technology are more important than history. Discuss both these views and give your own opinions.