IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Poor people and those living in the rural areas find it difficult to acess university education. University should make it easy for persons from this background . To what extent do you agree or disagree.

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Nowadays, not only the poor
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 but
also
Linking Words
who
Correct determiner usage
those who
show examples
lives
Correct subject-verb agreement
live
show examples
 in the countryside
faces
Correct subject-verb agreement
face
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
academic
Use synonyms
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
show examples
,
which
Correct pronoun usage
it
show examples
 is not simplify to obtain
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
university
Use synonyms
opportunity
Fix the agreement mistake
opportunities
show examples
. Bringing individuals to the
university
Use synonyms
 education, the institution should take
responsible
Replace the word
responsibility
show examples
 for making it
ease
Correct your spelling
easy
show examples
 for them. I personally
disagee
Correct your spelling
disagree
to
Change preposition
with
show examples
this
Linking Words
 statement and the reasons why will be examined in
this
Linking Words
 essay. First and foremost, many universities in the world
make
Verb problem
give
show examples
 a chance to students, not only provided to poor people, but
also
Linking Words
 to
everone
Correct your spelling
everyone
, which has a right to access through it.
This
Linking Words
 can be emphasized that there are various scholarships including daily life expenses, tuition throughout the courses, or
scholarship
Fix the agreement mistake
scholarships
show examples
 for poverty, especially. The whole worldwide students ought to
endeavor
Change the spelling
endeavour
show examples
 the requirements of each
university
Use synonyms
 to achieve the offer and scholar, that everyone has to attempt
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
themselves.
In other words
Linking Words
, everyone has their own choices and opportunities, learning across bachelor's or master's
degree
Fix the agreement mistake
degrees
show examples
,
whereas
Linking Words
 it needs
passionate
Replace the word
passion
show examples
 and determination. In my perspective, the
university
Use synonyms
 should not take
this
Linking Words
 responsibility directly because
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 root of
this
Linking Words
problem
Use synonyms
 is
due to
Linking Words
 the
socialtal
Correct your spelling
societal
 inequality, which the
government
Use synonyms
 should be considered to tackle
this
Linking Words
problem
Use synonyms
 as well.
For example
Linking Words
, the inequality of
education
Correct article usage
the education
show examples
 system in rural areas, the
government
Use synonyms
 should
more
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
support
education
Correct article usage
the education
show examples
 system
such
Linking Words
 as expanding the high schools,
improving
Correct word choice
and improving
show examples
 teachers and authorities to be more efficient.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the
government
Use synonyms
 has to offer
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
scholarships to the poverty and in other
living
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
countryside, and
this
Linking Words
 educational
problem
Use synonyms
 can be solved. In conclusion, many universities offer
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
sufficient
opportinities
Correct your spelling
opportunities
 to the poor and others including a versatile of scholarships.
However
Linking Words
,
Use synonyms
Add an article
the university
a university
show examples
university
Fix the agreement mistake
universities
show examples
 should not take
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
charge of
this
Linking Words
problem
Use synonyms
 directly,
whereas
Linking Words
 the
government
Use synonyms
 has to participate to solve and encourage
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
poverty and rural citizens as well.

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task achievement
Your essay does a good job of addressing the topic and presenting a personal viewpoint. However, it would be beneficial to elaborate more on your arguments and provide additional relevant examples to support your points.
coherence cohesion
While your essay is logically structured, there are a few sections where the coherence could be improved. Try to use linking phrases and transitions more effectively to guide the reader through your arguments smoothly.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single idea and that the ideas are well-developed. Consider refining your introduction and main points for clearer communication of your position.
coherence cohesion
Pay attention to grammatical accuracy and vocabulary use to enhance clarity and readability. Minor grammatical errors can sometimes disrupt the flow of your essay.
introduction conclusion present
Your introduction and conclusion are clear and provide a good framework for your essay.
logical structure
Despite some minor errors, the structure and logical flow of your essay are quite strong.
complete response
You have addressed the task and provided a personal stance, which is essential for a strong essay.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Financial barriers
  • Tuition fees
  • Accommodation costs
  • Travel expenses
  • Financial aid programs
  • Scholarships
  • Reduced tuition fees
  • Accessibility issues
  • Preparatory resources
  • Internet connectivity
  • Online courses
  • Satellite campuses
  • Outreach programs
  • Career counselling
  • Inclusive admission policies
  • Socio-economic background
  • Holistic review processes
  • Bridge programs
  • Logistical challenges
  • Motivate
  • Guide
  • Disadvantaged backgrounds
What to do next:
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