Some people think it is more important to spend money on road and motorways rather than on public transport systems such as railways and trams.
In today’s world, it is a common belief that expanding money on making streets and highways is more advantageous than public transit. In my opinion, I totally disagree with the idea that it is necessary to spend on roads and motorways because it causes pollution and wastes a myriad of money.
It is vital to understand that building some new highways will lead to the destruction of natural habitats.
Due to
the fact that the more streets are opened, the more vehicles will be used, resulting in a level of emission that will cause air pollution. Take an example in HCM city, where the motorway system is expanded everywhere, whereas
public transport such
as train stations or underground rarely developed. This
gives rise to greenhouses, not only that, but people can get diseases when get out of their houses. Therefore
, if people have just used to shipment by road, the environment will have been polluted and led to climate change.
I believe that spending on developing public transportation is a good way to save the finances. Because the cost of a car or motorbike is more expensive than a ticket train, this
needs to be used for emergency situations. For instance
, Japan is known as a country that is
very developed in underground and railway systems, as they always choose trains or trams to go to work rather than vehicles, thanks to the convenience, suitable prices and friendly environment. Additionally
, investing in public transportation systems can reduce traffic tram and many accidents.
In conclusion, my view is that expenditures on roads and motorways are more disadvantageous,
because focusing on developing public services can help people save money and protect the environment.Remove the comma
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coherence cohesion
The essay should have a more organized logical structure. Consider using paragraphs more effectively to clearly separate different points.
task achievement
Ensure each main point is well-supported with clear and relevant examples. This will make your argument stronger and more persuasive.
coherence cohesion
Avoid repetition of ideas and try to vary your sentence structure. This can make your writing more engaging and easier to follow.
coherence cohesion
You have a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps the reader understand your overall argument.
task achievement
You successfully address the prompt and present your opinion clearly on the importance of spending on public transport systems.
task achievement
You provided relevant examples which help to illustrate your points, particularly the example about HCM city and Japan.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?