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Writing Samples /
Band 3

Some people think it is more important to spend money on roads motorways than on public transport systems such as railways and trams. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #money #roads #motorways #transport #systems #railways #trams
In the modern age, many individuals tend to invest in streets and
express ways
Correct your spelling
expressways
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 rather than public
transport
. Personally, I disagree with
this
 suggestion based on some major reasons that are explained
further
 in
this
 essay. First of all, our environment can be harmed by investing
on
Change preposition
in
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trail
Fix the agreement mistake
trails
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 and streets which were used for vehicles.
For
instance
Add a comma
instance,
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 building new roads can resist traffic
jam
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jams
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 contem porarily but
this
 way will not benefit forever because of the growth of population leading to the high demand of using cars and motorbikes. From that, the more vehicles appear, the more
emission
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emissions
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was
Wrong verb form
are
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 discharged,
this
Correct pronoun usage
which this
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 the key factor of global warming .
Besides
, new routes are developed and built could deplete natural resources. Another point to consider
that
Add a missing verb
is that
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 spending money on social
transport
such
 as subways,trams,
trains
Correct word choice
and trains
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 could alleviate environmental problems and devote to our daily
life
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lives
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 conveniently. It can be seen that people in
modern day
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modern-day
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. In conclusion, I strongly disagree that it is more reasonable to invest money in building roads and freeways rather than public
transport
 facilities. Funding public
transport
 systems can, for one thing, make individuals’ everyday life more convenient, and, for another, conserve the environment.
Therefore
, it is suggested that the authorities prioritise developing public
transport
 systems.
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relevant specific examples
Try to provide more specific examples and evidence to support your points. Right now, the essay lacks detailed and specific examples which could strengthen your argument.
clear comprehensive ideas
Expand more on your points in the body paragraphs to make your arguments more comprehensive and clear. This will help in achieving a clearer and more detailed response.
logical structure
While your introduction and conclusion are well-structured, focusing on the body paragraphs to ensure logical coherence and connection between ideas would greatly improve your essay.
introduction conclusion present
Strong introduction and conclusion sections which clearly present and summarise your perspective.
complete response
The essay addresses the prompt and provides a clear stance on the issue being discussed.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • infrastructure
  • public transport systems
  • economic growth
  • traffic congestion
  • carbon emissions
  • social equity
  • urban development
  • sustainable
  • mobility needs
  • revitalization
  • efficiency
  • safety
  • reliance
  • combatting
  • mitigating
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