THE TWO FLOOR PLANS SHOWS THE RENOVATIONS OF ACOUNTACY MAIN OFFFICE

CONTAINED IN THE DIAGRAMS ARE PLANS WHICH RELATE TO
RENOVATES
Wrong verb form
RENOVATING
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THE MAIN
OFFICE
OF ACCOUNTANCY. IN GENERAL, CHANGES WILL OCCUR TO DECREASE THE NUMBER OF FAX AND COPIER. IT CAN
ALSO
BE OBSERVED THAT THE SPACE FOR
OFFICE
Correct article usage
THE OFFICE
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HAS SEEN A DISAPPERENCE
WHILE
AN EXTRA SOFA IS CONSTRUCTED. BEGINNING WITH THE ENTRANCE, LOOKING STRAIGHT AHEAD OS FRONT
DESK
WITH CRESENT
SHAPED
Replace the word
SHAPE
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WHICH IS SURROUNDED BY EXTRA DINANS.
NEXT,
IS THE STORAGE ROOM WHICH
HS
Correct your spelling
IS
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RELOCATED TO THE TOP LEFT CORNER
WHILE
FACILITIES
IS
Correct subject-verb agreement
ARE
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BUIT
Correct your spelling
BUILT
IN THE AREA THAT USED TO BE. tHE PAYROLL
OFFICE
HAVE BEEN REPLACED BY A SOFA WHICH NEVER HAS BEFORE. TO THE RIGHT OF
THIS
OFFICE
, ALL LUNCH, MEETING
ROOM
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ROOMS
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AND
MANAGER'S
Correct article usage
THE MANAGER'S
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OFFICE
HAVE MINOR CHANGES IN
SIZES
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SIZE
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. MOVING ON TO THE OPPOSITE SIDE, THE NEWLY CONSTRUCTED CUSTOMER OFFICES HAVE BEEN REMOVED TO MAKE WAY FOR
DESK
AREAS A FAX MACHINE AND A COPIER.
NEXT,
THE PROCESSING
OFFICE
IS KNOCKES DOWN FOR
DESK
AREAS. THE ACCOUNTS
OFFICE
HAS DISAPPEARED TO A RELOCATED STORAGE
ARE
Correct your spelling
AREA
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WHILE
THE RECEPTION AREA HAS BEEN ENLARGED TO INCLUDE A LONG ENTRY AND A FRONT
DESK
THAT HAS BEEN COVERED BY NEW SEATING ARRANGEMENTS.
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grammar
Ensure that all sentences are grammatically correct. Try to avoid typos and spelling mistakes, for example: 'renovates' should be 'renovations', 'DINANS' should be 'DINING', and 'HS' should be 'HAS'.
coherence cohesion
Improve overall coherence and cohesion by linking sentences more effectively. For instance, use cohesive devices like 'Moreover', 'In addition', and 'However'.
structure
A more structured introduction and conclusion can significantly improve the essay. Consider summarizing the main points in the introduction and providing a brief conclusion.
task achievement
The essay provides a fairly complete response, addressing most of the visual information in the diagrams.
relevant points
The essay includes specific examples and details regarding the office changes, which help in comprehension.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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