IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The graph shows the number of people taking parts in 4 kinds of sports in a particular region between 1985 and 2005. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph shows the number of people taking parts in 4 kinds of sports in a particular region between 1985 and 2005. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
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Contained in the given line graph is the information related to the
quantity
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
 of residents of a
Correct your spelling
particular
particulart
Correct your spelling
particular
 area who
participate
Wrong verb form
participated
show examples
 in 4 different sports from 1985 to 2005
Overall
Linking Words
 , it can be seen that tennis saw an increase in
participants
Use synonyms
 ,
whereas
Linking Words
 Rugby had a decline . It is
also
Linking Words
 worth noting how throughout
this
Linking Words
 period , both
basketball
Use synonyms
 and badminton remained unchanged with always more people joining
basketball
Use synonyms
 . Regarding two sports which witnessed a noticeable change in the amount of
participants
Use synonyms
 . As for Rugby , it stood at just under 250 people before significantly decreasing to about 50 until the end . By
constrast
Correct your spelling
contrast
, throughout
20-year
Add an article
the 20-year
show examples
 duration , there was a gradual rise in
tennis's
Change noun form
tennis
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participants
Use synonyms
 from just over 150 people to approximately 220 . Turning to the remaining sports which saw insignificant change ,
basketball
Use synonyms
 and badminton in 1985
were
Verb problem
had
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 nearly 50 and 80
participants
Use synonyms
 , respectively . In terms of
basketball
Use synonyms
 , between 1985 and 1995 , it increased slightly but soon remained constant until 2005 . Meanwhile , badminton decreased in
first
Correct article usage
the first
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 5 years before recovering and
stay
Wrong verb form
staying
show examples
 unchanged for the entire period

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words participants, basketball with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "change" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "remained" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "unchanged" was used 2 times.
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