Some people think that robots are important for humans’ future development. Other think that robot have negative effects on society. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In the modern era, the growth of technology leading to the crucial role of
robots
is predicted by experts.
Robots
will be applied in manufacturing chains and be an assistance to folk. Using automatic
machines
will have a lot of negative impacts on society. One factor must be known that
robots
are the invention that can replace humans in all work. These products have a lot of abilities
such
as solving simple logical work
,
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apply
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and doing physical tasks more efficiently and accurately than humans.
Therefore
, many
robots
will appear in industrializations and companies. These
machines
are
also
applied in science
Fix the infinitive
to discovers
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discovers
Correct subject-verb agreement
discover
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too many dangerous places without any risks to people.
For example
, NASA ran space
robots
on the Moon to collect pictures and things belonging to
this
planet.
This
case shows the large potential of applying
robots
in the future.
Nevertheless
, these circumstances
also
bring negative effects to society. Too many
machines
in people’s lives can let them lose control of our world. People must rely on
robots
when these
machines
are applied widely. If an error system and all of the technology objects stop working, people will fall into the worst situation that they do not have any applicants to run their lives.
Moreover
, depending too much on
robots
also
decreases human health. society
do
Change the verb form
does
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not need to take much action, they just let
robots
do their job
instead
of them and their lives will become shorter
due to
the lack of activities we get. In conclusion,
robots
will be an object to assist
population
Add an article
the population
show examples
in work and it will give
public
Correct article usage
the public
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more chances to discover the world.
In
contrast
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contrast,
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side, depending too much on
robots
can make
community
Correct article usage
the community
show examples
weaker and have less independence.
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coherence
Ensure that tense consistency is maintained and rephrase certain sentences to enhance clarity and coherence. For instance, instead of 'Too many machines in people’s lives can let them lose control of our world,' consider 'The widespread use of robots may lead to humanity losing control over its own society.'
task achievement
Provide more specific examples and elaborate on some points. For example, discussing the impact of robots on unemployment rates or the ethical considerations regarding AI could strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
Avoid repetitive phrases such as 'too many' and ensure a variety of word choices to improve readability and engagement.
introduction conclusion present
The introduction is clear and sets up the discussion of both views effectively.
clear comprehensive ideas
You have effectively introduced the potential benefits and drawbacks of robots, and your conclusion summarizes both sides well while providing your own opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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