Some people think that robots are important for humans’ future development. Other think that robot have negative effects on society. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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In the modern era, the growth of technology leading to the crucial role of
robots
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is predicted by experts.
Robots
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will be applied in manufacturing chains and be an assistance to folk. Using automatic
machines
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will have a lot of negative impacts on society. One factor must be known that
robots
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are the invention that can replace humans in all work. These products have a lot of abilities
such
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as solving simple logical work
,
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apply
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and doing physical tasks more efficiently and accurately than humans.
Therefore
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, many
robots
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will appear in industrializations and companies. These
machines
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are
also
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applied in science
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to discovers
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discovers
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discover
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too many dangerous places without any risks to people.
For example
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, NASA ran space
robots
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on the Moon to collect pictures and things belonging to
this
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planet.
This
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case shows the large potential of applying
robots
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in the future.
Nevertheless
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, these circumstances
also
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bring negative effects to society. Too many
machines
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in people’s lives can let them lose control of our world. People must rely on
robots
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when these
machines
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are applied widely. If an error system and all of the technology objects stop working, people will fall into the worst situation that they do not have any applicants to run their lives.
Moreover
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, depending too much on
robots
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also
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decreases human health. society
do
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does
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not need to take much action, they just let
robots
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do their job
instead
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of them and their lives will become shorter
due to
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the lack of activities we get. In conclusion,
robots
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will be an object to assist
population
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the population
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in work and it will give
public
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the public
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more chances to discover the world.
In
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contrast
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contrast,
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side, depending too much on
robots
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can make
community
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the community
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weaker and have less independence.
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coherence
Ensure that tense consistency is maintained and rephrase certain sentences to enhance clarity and coherence. For instance, instead of 'Too many machines in people’s lives can let them lose control of our world,' consider 'The widespread use of robots may lead to humanity losing control over its own society.'
task achievement
Provide more specific examples and elaborate on some points. For example, discussing the impact of robots on unemployment rates or the ethical considerations regarding AI could strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
Avoid repetitive phrases such as 'too many' and ensure a variety of word choices to improve readability and engagement.
introduction conclusion present
The introduction is clear and sets up the discussion of both views effectively.
clear comprehensive ideas
You have effectively introduced the potential benefits and drawbacks of robots, and your conclusion summarizes both sides well while providing your own opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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