Many people join distance-learning program and study at home, but some people think that it cannot bring the same benefit as attending colleges or universities does. Do you agree or disagree?

In recent times, online learning programs and study at home have increasingly become popular amongst pupils of all ages.
This
has made the students' lives much easier.
However
, like everything else, there are two sides to the picture. I partially disagree with distance learning
instead
of on-site learning. In
this
essay, I will give my reasons and
also
how it might be beneficial to some. First off, off-site learning is a fairly new concept which has been introduced
due to
the recent lockdowns
due to
coronavirus in which many peers were unable to attend physical lessons,
this
clearly indicates that it is only an alternative to the traditional schooling system.
Furthermore
, online learning isolates individuals from their homes giving them less access to facilities like libraries and limiting their social interaction which can lead to social anxiety and depression.
Additionally
, learning from far
also
Rephrase
away also
show examples
gives the learner plentiful opportunities to be lazy, lack motivation and not attend the lessons seriously leaving the teachers frustrated and lacking control over their classrooms.
On the other hand
, learning traditionally by going to facilities and attending lectures in person has been a tried and tested method of obtaining knowledge for centuries. In my experience, when I was taking online lectures during the coronavirus, I rarely took any of the lessons seriously and so did many of my classmates.
This
caused my grades and my interest in medicine to plummet. In summary, attending lectures in person is deemed more beneficial
overall
. In my opinion, if there is no pandemic or any other adversities stopping learners from attending physical classes they should
then
have no solid grounds to stay at home and take courses.
Submitted by James on

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task achievement
Although the essay presents a clear position, it could benefit from a stronger and more explicit thesis statement outlining the main points that will be discussed.
coherence cohesion
The structure of the essay is generally logical but could be enhanced by more clearly defined paragraphs and topic sentences.
coherence cohesion
Try to provide a greater variety of transitional phrases to improve the flow between ideas and paragraphs.
task achievement
The essay provides relevant examples and personal experiences that support the main ideas discussed.
task achievement
The essay successfully addresses both sides of the argument, showing an understanding of the complexity of the issue.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and reiterates the writer's stance.

Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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