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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

In some countries, it can be difficult for people over the age of 50 to get good jobs, despite their experience. What do you think are the causes and effects of this problem?

#countries #people #age #jobs #effects
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There are countries around the world in which it is difficult for individuals to get recruited
in
Change preposition
by
show examples
 reputed organisations with good jobs when they are over 50 despite having relevant experience. In
this
 essay, I will discuss some of the reasons for
this
 problem and how
this
 issue impacts
people
. The first and foremost reason to find better jobs for
people
 getting aged is that most organisations want to recruit young
people
instead
 of age.
This
 is because of the enthusiasm and energy that youngsters have in them;
moreover
, usually corporations think that over 50
people
 are inefficient and less active than their age.
Also
, as
people
 get older it's difficult for them to work long working hours as compared to young adults.
Besides
this
, old
people
 are rigid to change and are
also
 less flexible;
in addition
, aged workers are somehow incompatible with adopting the updated technological systems of the companies. If we talk about the effects of
this
 issue, when 50-plus
people
 are not able to grab better opportunities in the job market
then
 they feel inferior in society.
Moreover
, aged
people
 have lifetime experience with them, and when organisations deny recruiting them,
then
 ultimately they are not taking advantage of their experience, which is necessary for their success in the long run.
Furthermore
, aged workers who are not able to work in large multinational companies on better posts
then
 do not earn well, which eventually affects their lifestyle and standard of living. In conclusion, from an organisation's point of view, they are more interested in recruiting young individuals rather than old ones
due to
 their talents, energy, and flexibility to change, but ultimately
this
 trend somehow has a negative impact on 50-plus
people
due to
 inferiority and fewer earnings.
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relevant specific examples
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clear comprehensive ideas
Try to provide more in-depth explanations of each reason or effect. Adding more details or elaborating on how certain factors directly influence the situation can improve clarity and depth.
introduction conclusion present
The essay has a well-structured introduction and conclusion, which helps frame the discussion neatly.
logical structure
The main points are logically structured and supported, contributing to a coherent flow throughout the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • age discrimination
  • workplace culture
  • rapid technological advancements
  • higher salary expectations
  • financial instability
  • retirement plans
  • unemployment
  • mental and emotional wellbeing
  • health concerns
  • tech-savvy
  • experience
  • modern skills
  • resistant to new technologies
  • insurance costs
  • purposelessness
What to do next:
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