Nowadays, more people are choosing to socialize online rather than face-to-face. why is this happening? is this a positive or negative development?

#people #development

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In contemporary society, many individuals tend to utilize social media to socialize and communicate with other

people

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rather than direct

communication

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. There are several reasons why

this

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trend is booming and I strongly argue that

this

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is a positive

development

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To begin

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with, a few reasons are why many

people

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use online platforms,

firstly

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and foremost, the convenience that they can get by using

this

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kind of way.

In other words

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this

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practice allows most

people

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to maintain their relationships with their families or colleagues just via telephone or video call regardless of the distance.

Moreover

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this

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method offers less effort which helps more

people

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easily access even from their homes and is not required to go outside. To add another interesting point,

this

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is affordable so, they do not need to spend a lot of money.

Thus

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, more and more

people

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are relying on

this

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development

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. Based on the above reasons, I believe that socialization through the Internet is a positive

development

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since

this

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phenomenon has numerous advantages for most

people

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. In fact, cutting-edge technology provides a plethora of features that they can access through their mobile phone which indeed improves whole well-being and strengthens relationships. Despite face-to-face

communication

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, it is still useful on a daily basis,

however

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, progressive

communication

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with a sophisticated system

gains

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has gained

show examples

popularity .

For instance

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communication

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applications including WhatsApp, Telegram and Zoom. In a nutshell, the way humankind socializes has swiftly changed from traditional methods to virtual

communication

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using technological advancement.

Therefore

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, I firmly think that

this

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trend is a positive

development

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Submitted by mfmakarim55 on Wed Jul 31 2024

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task achievement

Consider providing more specific examples to support your points. For instance, you can elaborate on how particular technologies or platforms have positively impacted communication.

coherence cohesion

Work on sentence variety to improve the flow of your essay. Mixing short and long sentences will make your writing more engaging.

coherence cohesion

The essay presents a clear introduction and conclusion, effectively framing your arguments.

task achievement

You offer a comprehensive response to the task, addressing both parts of the prompt.

coherence cohesion

The logical structure of the essay is solid, with well-organized paragraphs and topic sentences.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

256 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

instant gratification
rapid advancement
instant communication
online shopping
fast food delivery
social media platforms
immediate feedback
recognition and validation
efficiency
productivity
convenience
decreased patience
delayed gratification
realistic expectations
work ethic
unrealistic expectations
stress
dissatisfaction

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Nowadays, more people are choosing to socialize online rather than face-to-face. why is this happening? is this a positive or negative development?

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Television is dangerous because it destroys family life and any sense of community; instead of visiting people or talking with our family, we just watch television. To what extent fo you agree or disagree with this opinion?

The use of social media, such as Facebook and Twitter, is replacing face-to-face contact in this century. Do you think the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people think that the most important thing about being rich is it gives a person the opportunity to help other people. Do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

People living in the 21st century have a better life quality than people who lived in previous times. to what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that a sense of competition in children should be encouraged. Others believe that children who are taught to cooperate rather than compete become more useful adults. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.