Nowadays, more people are choosing to socialize online rather than face-to-face. why is this happening? is this a positive or negative development?

In contemporary society, many individuals tend to utilize social media to socialize and communicate with other
people
rather than direct
communication
. There are several reasons why
this
trend is booming and I strongly argue that
this
is a positive
development
.
To begin
with, a few reasons are why many
people
use online platforms,
firstly
and foremost, the convenience that they can get by using
this
kind of way.
In other words
,
this
practice allows most
people
to maintain their relationships with their families or colleagues just via telephone or video call regardless of the distance.
Moreover
,
this
method offers less effort which helps more
people
easily access even from their homes and is not required to go outside. To add another interesting point,
this
is affordable so, they do not need to spend a lot of money.
Thus
, more and more
people
are relying on
this
development
. Based on the above reasons, I believe that socialization through the Internet is a positive
development
since
this
phenomenon has numerous advantages for most
people
. In fact, cutting-edge technology provides a plethora of features that they can access through their mobile phone which indeed improves whole well-being and strengthens relationships. Despite face-to-face
communication
, it is still useful on a daily basis,
however
, progressive
communication
with a sophisticated system
gains
Wrong verb form
has gained
show examples
popularity .
For instance
,
communication
applications including WhatsApp, Telegram and Zoom. In a nutshell, the way humankind socializes has swiftly changed from traditional methods to virtual
communication
using technological advancement.
Therefore
, I firmly think that
this
trend is a positive
development
.
Submitted by mfmakarim55 on

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task achievement
Consider providing more specific examples to support your points. For instance, you can elaborate on how particular technologies or platforms have positively impacted communication.
coherence cohesion
Work on sentence variety to improve the flow of your essay. Mixing short and long sentences will make your writing more engaging.
coherence cohesion
The essay presents a clear introduction and conclusion, effectively framing your arguments.
task achievement
You offer a comprehensive response to the task, addressing both parts of the prompt.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure of the essay is solid, with well-organized paragraphs and topic sentences.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • instant gratification
  • rapid advancement
  • instant communication
  • online shopping
  • fast food delivery
  • social media platforms
  • immediate feedback
  • recognition and validation
  • efficiency
  • productivity
  • convenience
  • decreased patience
  • delayed gratification
  • realistic expectations
  • work ethic
  • unrealistic expectations
  • stress
  • dissatisfaction
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