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In recent years the family structures have changed as well as the family roles. What are the changes that are occouring. What do you think can be done to mend it?

#years #structures #roles #changes
The bar chart illustrates the prevalence of three primary methods for accessing daily news across five distinct
age
 categories during the year 2011.
Overall
, it is evident that microblogging emerged as the least
favored
Change the spelling
favoured
show examples
 option among the surveyed platforms,
while
 the utilization of social networking sites displayed an inverse correlation with
age
. Radio broadcasting appears to be the most widely embraced medium for news consumption, with approximately 85% to slightly over 90% of individuals aged 18 and older tuning in daily.
Conversely
, the younger demographic, aged 10 to 17, exhibited a lower inclination towards radio, with only 40% indicating its preference.
In contrast
, social networking platforms garnered substantial engagement among younger
age
 groups, ranging from approximately 80% for individuals aged 10 to 29.
However
, usage declined steadily with advancing
age
, dropping to 50% for the 30-49
age
 bracket, 40% for the 50-64 cohort, and 25% for the eldest
age
 group. Microblogging emerged as the least
favored
Change the spelling
favoured
show examples
 news source
overall
, with popularity peaking among individuals aged 18 to 29 at around 25%, but experiencing lower proportions among other
age
 cohorts, consistently remaining below 20%.
Submitted by Nghỉ hè vui vẻ cả nhà on

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coherence cohesion
The essay could benefit from a clearer concluding statement that summarizes the key findings succinctly.
coherence cohesion
While the overall structure is logical, including topic sentences would enhance the clarity of each paragraph.
task achievement
Consider adding more specific numerical values or comparisons between age groups to strengthen the details provided.
task achievement
Your essay provides a thorough response to the task, covering all relevant aspects of the data.
coherence cohesion
Main points are well-supported with specific examples from the chart.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure and flow of information is clear, making it easy to follow your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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