Some people think that the modern communication technology is having negative efect on social relationships. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

In light of the proliferation of technology, many assert it may indeed have potential drawbacks to users.
However
,
this
writer leans towards it not only almost offering no disadvantage but
also
connecting each other. It must be acknowledged that numerous conflicts have happened via social networks.
Nevertheless
, technology cannot be blamed for these faults
such
as verbal bullying, but users' cognition.
In other words
, eschewing direct conversation in favour of internet-based technology would have no considerable disparities. Taking Facebook as an example many individuals suppose toxic behaviours on
this
platform might affect
to
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the mental well-being of others
while
if it was traditional communication, the result would not change because of detrimental characteristics.
Additionally
, technological gadgets facilitate communication regardless of time constraints and geographical boundaries. It can be translated into avoiding the restrictions of those living in
the
Correct article usage
apply
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remote areas with their relationships, resulting in a plethora of benefits.
For instance
, overseas students may employ video call applications to contact their families and relatives which enhances the quality of relationships
besides
significant savings of deliveries physical letters and time-consuming. In conclusion, notwithstanding the opinion of drawbacks that modern interaction offers to users, I would opine that the benefits society
accrue
Correct subject-verb agreement
accrues
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to from
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are far weightier

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coherence cohesion
To improve, ensure that your introduction and conclusion are more clearly defined and fully address the topic. Your essay should have a clear stance and argumentative structure.
task achievement
Clarify your main points and provide more specific examples to fully support your argument. This will make your essay more convincing and robust.
coherence cohesion
Your essay provides a balanced view on the topic, presenting both positive and negative aspects of modern communication technology.
task achievement
You have used relevant examples, such as Facebook and video call applications, to illustrate your points.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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