Some people think that the modern communication technology is having negative effect on social relationships. To what extent do you agree or disagree
It is often said that modern automation for connection is harmful to public affairs.
This
writer believes that it is not true due to
the reason of keeping in touch via social platforms and can be a valuable resource to make new companions.
It must be understood that that people can talk with their intimates despite far distance of modern connection technology. In other words
, people use social media in order to strengthen their bonds of relationships. As a consequence
, people can keep in touch thanks to the modern machinery. For example
, in Vietnam, many residents use Zalo as a form to get in touch with their confidant due to
its function of adding partners autonomously. Thus
, social platforms can be a way to keep the relationship among the users.
Another point worth considering is that modern contact technology can act as a platform to make new companions. This
means that we can spread our relationships with new partners on the Internet. Also
, we can make friends
with a totally new guy. As a result
, we can expand our association with the mates of our mates. Take Facebook as an example, there is a task that allows us to know the friends
of our partners, so we can expand our association. Hence
, social media can be a resource for us to make new friends
.
In conclusion, social platforms can play a role in improving conversation and making new friends
. Furthermore
, modern delivery machinery is not harmful towards public links.Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task achievement
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea and that all parts of the task are fully addressed. This essay provides valid points but could elaborate more on how modern communication technology can strengthen relationships rather than just mentioning social media platforms.
coherence cohesion
Work on improving the logical flow between paragraphs and within each paragraph. Utilizing more cohesive devices can help maintain a smooth flow of ideas.
task achievement
The essay addresses both aspects of the prompt by discussing the perceived negative effects and then proving why they might not be true.
coherence cohesion
Introduction and conclusion are clear and relevant to the topic.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?