Some people think that it is better for kids to learn with online educational materials, while others believe kids should learn with hard copy/printed educational materials. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In the contemporary epoch, there is an ongoing debate on whether kids can self-study
on
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apply
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printed exercise materials or whether they have a chance to work on platforms and
devices
to explore more. In
this
essay, I will explain
the
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apply
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both views as I personally agree with them.
To begin
with, learning through online courses
has
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gives
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a lot of chances to dive into any subject easily by clicking only
button
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one button
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in
few
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a few
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seconds so that children can find
these information
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this information
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easily without any
distraction
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distractions
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.
Furthermore
, it has equal sides.
On the other hand
, spending too much time on
devices
may cause an addiction and alteration to the behaviours. Addicting to
devices
in
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at
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the
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an
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early age of life undeniably
cause
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causes
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some difficulties to the developing brains and it will have a majority of negative effects on their future.
For example
, my 4-year-old cousin can count
one
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from one
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to twenty fluently in English because he has watched tons of videos
from
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on
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Youtube
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YouTube
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in English and learned from them.
However
, he
has
Verb problem
is
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addicted to phone and
stucks
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sticks
to it every single time even though he is still young. I personally believe that learning through
devices
will have equal pros and cons.
On the other hand
, working on printed materials personally will develop both
side
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sides
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of
brain
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the brain
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and learn as much as possible by drawing and highlighting
on
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apply
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them so that they will distinguish every single
information
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piece of information
show examples
by the colors or underlines. As I mentioned above, everything has two sides. Overconsumption of paper will lead
manufacture
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manufacturing
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workers to cut down more trees and damage natural areas of the earth.
For example
, to production of paper we are daily using is all made from trees. To serve us with these papers, manufacturers cutting down millions of trees per year
that
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which
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is leading to several problems namely climate change, air pollution and more.
To sum up
,
however
, working on paper and using
devices
to dive more into it
are
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is
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effective,
they
Correct word choice
but they
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always cause problems
to
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for
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creatures.
Submitted by nazim200709 on

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Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph addresses a single idea clearly to enhance comprehension.
Coherence and Cohesion
Improve the introduction by clearly stating your position and what the essay will cover.
Coherence and Cohesion
Use more variety in transitional words and phrases to further improve the flow of ideas.
Task Achievement
Make sure to develop each point with sufficient and relevant examples.
Task Achievement
Clarify your conclusion by summarizing the main points and restating your position effectively.
General
Work on avoiding repetition and enhancing vocabulary to express ideas more precisely.
Task Achievement
The essay covers both sides of the argument, providing a balanced view.
Coherence and Cohesion
Introduction and conclusion are present, adding structure to the essay.
Task Achievement
Use of personal examples makes the argument more relatable and concrete.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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