Many people say that globalisation and the growing number of multinational companies have a negative effect on the environmental. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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The
world
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is struggling to increase
economy
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the economy
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.Most
of
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apply
show examples
proponents believe that
increasing
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the increasing
show examples
number
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of
mutinational
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multinational
multinationals
industries
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and
globalisation
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is
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are
show examples
harmful
for
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to
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the
environment
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.I strongly advocate with
this
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statement that internationalization
reversly
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reversibly
effects
Replace the word
affects
show examples
the
environment
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and
putting
Wrong verb form
puts
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heavy
Add an article
a heavy
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strain on developing
countries
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.The following
paragraphes
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paragraphs
will discuss
this
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notion.
Firstly
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,
globalisation
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is the way for
development
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the development
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and progress of a country.
Large
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A large
The large
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number
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of multinational
companies
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are considered the rise the economy chart of a nation ,
while
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it brings a
number
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of problems that negatively
effect
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affect
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the
environment
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of that country and in the long run
effect
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affect
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the whole
world
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.These
industries
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often exploit natural resources in developing
countries
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without adequate consideration for environmental sustainability,leading to
deforestration
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deforestation
,water pollution and loss of biodiversity.
For example
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,logging of forests for building
companies
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and mixing of factories
wast
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waste
show examples
in
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apply
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natural resources of water leads to water
as well as
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air contamination.
Furthermore
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,
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the expantion
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expantion
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expansion
of global trade means
increased
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an increased
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number
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of transportation of goods across the
world
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,significantly contributing to greenhouse gas emissions and global warming. As many developed
countries
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have maintained
stricked
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strict
rules and regulations.So multinational
industries
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move operations to
countries
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with weaker environmental
regulation
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regulations
show examples
,enabling them to pollute
exploit
Correct word choice
and exploit
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resources without facing significant legal consequences.
For example
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,in the
last
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few
decads
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decades
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,China progressed vastly because China gives relaxation to all these
companies
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.The reason behind
this
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is the economic pressure so many developing nations prioritize economic growth over environmental protection
due to
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pressure to attract foreign investment ,leading to lax enforcement of environmental standards.
On the other hand
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,some
industries
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follow the rules to protect the
environment
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by using green technologies and sustainable practices,
thus
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showcasing that
globalisation
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can drive
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
environmental improvement.
To conclude
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,
although
Linking Words
economic pressure is a great cause for
globalisation
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,multinational
companies
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negatively
effecting
Verb problem
affect
show examples
the
environment
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.
Everycountry
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Every country
need
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needs
show examples
to
develope
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develop
rules to prohibit
this
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damage and
industries
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should
also
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take part
for
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in
show examples
world
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protection.

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coherence cohesion
To improve your score, make sure to provide a clearer structure for your paragraphs. Each topic sentence should clearly introduce the main point of the paragraph.
task achievement
While you have addressed the task, it would be beneficial to elaborate on your points further. Include more detailed examples and explanations to fully support your arguments.
task achievement
Your essay effectively addresses the prompt and provides a clear standpoint on the issue.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion ties together the main points discussed and offers a reasonable solution.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Environmental degradation
  • Natural resources
  • Sustainability
  • Deforestation
  • Biodiversity
  • Carbon footprint
  • Greenhouse gas emissions
  • Global warming
  • Regulatory evasion
  • Foreign investment
  • Green technologies
  • Sustainable practices
  • Global awareness
  • International regulations
  • Cooperation on environmental protection
  • Economic growth
  • Environmental standards
  • Transportation of goods
  • Developing countries
  • Legal consequences
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