Some people like to spend their leisure time with their colleagues while others prefer to keep their private life separate from their work life. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

It is often said that

people

Use synonyms

usually spend their spare time with their coworkers,

whereas

Linking Words

others enjoy their privacy after work. Both sides have different advantages and drawbacks. From my perspective, I partially agree with

this

Linking Words

notion and will elaborate on it in the following paragraphs.

Firstly

Linking Words

, taking free time with workmates demonstrates healthier relationships, which can help you develop soft skills, hard skills, and social knowledge. One of the greatest reasons to attend coworkers' activities is the opportunity to connect with the managers at work,

hence

Linking Words

, you will get a promotion more easily.

Also

Linking Words

, there is no better way to become well-known at work, especially if you are a newcomer than to spend a

leisure

Replace the word

leisurely

show examples

day with your workmates.

However

Linking Words

, joining in many activities

while

Linking Words

being an introverted person will drain your energy very fast.

According to

Linking Words

some

people

Use synonyms

, navigating a party or even a tea break can lower their energy levels because of being surrounded by an unknown community,

thus

Linking Words

, they will have to strive their communication skills to connect with others.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, after spending time with crowds, these

people

Use synonyms

need their own space to recharge their batteries by doing their hobbies alone.

As a result

Linking Words

, these

people

Use synonyms

would like to use their after-work life to be alone. In conclusion, I think that employees should focus on their career goals, not only to have plans for them but

also

Linking Words

to know how to use their out-of-work hours effectively. There is no doubt that you will get a better life by knowing who you are.

beautytear13Fri May 31 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion

Your essay has a good logical structure, but try to make the transitions between paragraphs smoother. This will help in improving the natural flow of the essay.

task achievement

You have addressed both views and provided your own opinion, which is great. However, try to include more relevant, specific examples to support your points, especially when discussing introverted individuals.

coherence cohesion

Your introduction sets the tone well and the conclusion effectively wraps up your discussion. This shows clear understanding and planning.

task achievement

You have made good points about both sides of the issue and shown a balanced view. This demonstrates a clear, comprehensive understanding of the topic.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

256 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6
band
Some people think government should ban dangerous sports. Others, however, say people have the freedom to make their own decisions. Discussion both views and give your own opinion.
In the contemporary era, people are inclined towards adventurous sports sparked a debate where proponents argue that it should be banned whereas , others advocate that people should decide for themselves about the risk involved. This essay will explore both the views and as far as my opinion is concerned, I favour the latter statement.
9
band
Governments in many countries have recently introduced special taxes on food and beverages with high levels of sugar. Some think that these taxes are a good idea while others disagree. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Recently, many have argued whether governments' implementation of special taxes on consumable products with high levels of sugar is a necessary development or not. Two sides emerged: those who agree with it and those who oppose it. Both parties present solid arguments, which will be discussed below and attached with a personal opinion.
7
band
Some think that too much money has been spent looking after and reparing old buildings, so we knock down old buildings and buikd modern ones instead. To what extent do you agree or disagree.
Whilst a substantial number of individuals assume that a large amount of money has been allocated to repairing and maintaining old constructions, I disagree with destructing old buildings as they are a part of culture and identity in each society.
7
band
Computers and AI technology are increasingly being used for online education. Can artificial intelligence enhance the learning experience? Is this a positive or negative development?
Nowadays, AI technology and computers are progressively being adopted for the improvement of knowledge. In my opinion, robotics can develop the learning experience and will have a positive impact on the education process.
6
band
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Advertising can tell you a lot about a country. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer
Some people argue that advertisements tell a lot about a country. I personally agree with this viewpoint because advertisements portray the culture and lifestyles, and illustrate the beliefs and thoughts of the people of a country to show how necessary their products are.

Some people like to spend their leisure time with their colleagues while others prefer to keep their private life separate from their work life. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people think government should ban dangerous sports. Others, however, say people have the freedom to make their own decisions. Discussion both views and give your own opinion.

Governments in many countries have recently introduced special taxes on food and beverages with high levels of sugar. Some think that these taxes are a good idea while others disagree. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some think that too much money has been spent looking after and reparing old buildings, so we knock down old buildings and buikd modern ones instead. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

Computers and AI technology are increasingly being used for online education. Can artificial intelligence enhance the learning experience? Is this a positive or negative development?

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Advertising can tell you a lot about a country. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer