In many countries, the number of animals and plants is declining. Why do you think this is happening? How can this issue be solved?

Nowadays a lot of countries facing with decrease in wildlife and green.

This

essay will explain the main reason for

this

alarming phenomenon and the actions that can be taken in

this

path to save our planet. The main reason for the ongoing thread is to related global climate changes made by the poisonous gases that

thrown

Add a missing verb

are thrown

show examples

away into the atmosphere without being processed. Because of that, many landscapes are changing drastically.

Hence

, these movements can damage many lives of animal breeds and greenery.

For instance

, reconstructional actions made in the Chinese province, Tiannan destroyed thousands of bamboo trees in order to build manufactures in the area.

As a result

, the

government

cut all bamboo trees in forests and did the major replacement of pandas

while

taking them from their home. These relocations put animals in trouble of decrease immediately. In order to solve

this

issue, the

government

have to take responsibility for industrial activities and should regulate possible damages made in the process of local reconstruction.

Furthermore

, the leading

organization

Fix the agreement mistake

organizations

show examples

have to focus

its

Correct pronoun usage

their

show examples

attention directly on the use of natural resources. Which basically aims to stop any kind of misuse by law and enforcement. The greatest example of the topic raised in recent European elections. The new

government

promises to prioritize changing climate and create responsible societies

while

building energy-safe resources. The

government

aims to invest in companies that will conduct research on how to keep animals safe in

this

process too. In conclusion, current challenges in nature and the downfall of habitats are reflected by constant changes.

This

can cause millions of species to disappear.

However

, most countries should be responsible with their ambitious planning to prevent any possible structural differences in existence.

Submitted by musayevjahangir on Fri May 31 2024

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task achievement

Your essay addresses both parts of the prompt: why the decline in wildlife and plant life is happening and how it can be solved. This demonstrates a clear understanding of the task.

task achievement

Try to articulate your ideas more comprehensively and explore them in greater depth to make your arguments more compelling.

coherence cohesion

The essay's structure is logical with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. However, the ideas within the paragraphs could be more clearly connected to improve overall cohesion.

coherence cohesion

It's useful to include linking phrases and words to ensure a smooth flow between sentences and paragraphs for better reader understanding.

task achievement

Provide more detailed examples or evidence to support your main points, which can help in making your argument stronger and more credible.

grammar

Review and correct grammatical errors, such as subject-verb agreement and article usage, for better clarity and readability. For example, 'reconstructional actions' could be revised to 'reconstruction actions'.

coherence cohesion

Your conclusion effectively summarizes the key points discussed in the essay, providing a clear and concise ending.

task achievement

The essay presents relevant examples, such as the occurrence in the Chinese province, which illustrates the impact of industrialization on wildlife.

task achievement

Your attempt to discuss solutions shows a commitment to addressing the prompt's second part, which adds value to your response.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

285 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

biodiversity
ecosystem
urbanization
deforestation
agricultural expansion
pollution control
greenhouse gas emissions
renewable energy
sustainable practices
overexploitation
invasive species
conservation
quarantine measures
eradication programs
public awareness campaigns
habitat destruction
climate change
natural habitats
species decline

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In many countries, the number of animals and plants is declining. Why do you think this is happening? How can this issue be solved?

Your opinion

Some people believe that governments must apply high taxes to provide good public services for everyone. Give your opinion.

Curiosity can be seen in many ways. Please share an example of how you have demonstrated curiosity and how that has influenced your growth.

Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organisation. Why might this be the case? What could be the disadvanatges of being self-employed?

There are many types of music in the world today. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important than the international music that is heard everywhere nowadays?

Some people say that art subjects such as music, drama and creative writing era an essential part of education, and every school should include them in its syllabus. Do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give your opinion and examples form your own experience.