The chart shows different level of post-school qualifications in Australia
The given graph illustrates the comparison of after-graduate qualifications in Australia and the percentages of
males
and females
who held them in 1999.
Overall
, from the graph, it is clear that
the data
for male Skilled Vocational Diploma
hit the highest point. Besides
, except for the Bachelor's Degree and the Undergraduate Diploma
, the percentages of males
were higher than females
.
In terms of data
for the Skilled Vocational Diploma
, there was a big difference ups
to 80% between the number of Replace the word
up
males
with 90% and females
with 10%. Regarding the figure for the Undergraduate Diploma
, the amount of the
Correct article usage
apply
females
was 70%, twice as much as that of male
with 35%. Fix the agreement mistake
males
While
the data
of males
for Bachelor's Degree was 45%, the figure of females
was 5% higher.
Compared to the number of females
, the data
of males
was higher than females
in the Postgraduate Diploma
with the
Correct article usage
apply
figure
is 70% and 30%. Fix the agreement mistake
figures
Finally
, the Masters Degree was held by more males
than females
. While
there was only 40% for females
and 60% for the rest.Submitted by quynhtranhbh on
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words males, females, data, diploma with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "data" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 2 times.
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