IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Learning English at school is often seen as more important than learning local languages. If these are not taught, many are at risk of dying out. In your opinion, is it important for everyone to learn English? Should we try to ensure the survival of local languages and, if so, how

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In recent years, the global proliferation of the
English
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language
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 has sparked a heated debate about its significance vis-à-vis local
languages
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.
While
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 some argue that
English
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 proficiency is indispensable, others contend that indigenous
languages
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 are equally important.
This
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 essay will delve into
both
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 perspectives and offer a nuanced view. On the one hand, proponents of
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English
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the English
show examples
language
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 argue that its widespread adoption is a prerequisite for effective communication in today's interconnected world. As the most widely spoken
language
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 globally,
English
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 has become the lingua franca, bridging the communication gap across national and cultural boundaries.
Furthermore
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, fluency in
English
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 can be a significant competitive advantage in the job market, particularly for those seeking employment in multinational corporations.
Additionally
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, the majority of international academic programs and research publications are in
English
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, making proficiency in the
language
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 essential for academic pursuits.
On the other hand
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, advocates of local
languages
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 emphasize their importance as symbols of cultural identity and heritage. Indigenous
languages
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 are often inextricably linked to a community's history, customs, and traditions.
For instance
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, in many African countries, local
languages
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 play a vital role in preserving cultural heritage, with traditional ceremonies and rituals often conducted in these
languages
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.
Asole
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Sole
 focus on
English
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 could lead to the erosion of cultural diversity and the loss of community identity. In conclusion,
both
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 perspectives have merit, and a balanced approach is necessary. Rather than pitting
English
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 against local
languages
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, educational institutions can integrate
both
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 into their curricula. By doing so, learners can develop proficiency in
English
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while
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 preserving their cultural heritage. Ultimately,
this
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 balanced approach can benefit
both
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 individuals and society at large.

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task achievement
You've done an excellent job of addressing the prompt fully. You have clearly expressed your opinions and provided ample support for your points. However, you might want to include a more specific example or statistical data to further solidify your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a strong logical flow and it is easy to follow your arguments. Each paragraph transitions smoothly into the next, enhancing the overall coherence. One area for improvement could be the inclusion of a brief acknowledgment of potential counterarguments to strengthen your position.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction effectively sets the stage for your discussion, and your conclusion nicely wraps up your essay by reinforcing your main points. One way to further improve is to ensure even tighter linkage between specific examples and your broader arguments.
coherence cohesion
Your essay is well-organized with a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. This makes your ideas easy to follow and contributes to the overall coherence of your response.
task achievement
You've demonstrated a good ability to support your main points with relevant examples and clear explanations, which bolsters your overall argument.
coherence cohesion
Your use of language is sophisticated and varied, helping to clearly convey your arguments and keeping the reader engaged.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • global communication
  • economic opportunities
  • cultural diversity
  • endangered
  • linguistic heritage
  • inclusive
  • multilingualism
  • language revitalization
  • language policy
  • language preservation
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