IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

The most important aim of science should be to improve people’s lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#aim #science #people’s #lives
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It is argued that the ultimate purpose of
science
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must lead
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is
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 to improve people's
lives
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. I completely agree with
this
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 statement because everyone uses GPS on their mobile phones to navigate unknown locations and advanced innovations in
science
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 help to cure a variety of diseases in the healthcare industry.
Science
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 and technology have become an integral part of human
lives
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 these days. Human day-to-day activities were quite challenging in previous centuries because of lacking
of
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apply
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devices to perform any jobs. Every activity was carried out manually and consumed vast time and resources.
Therefore
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due to
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 technological advancements, everything became easily manageable.
For example
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, if we want to go to an unknown place, we have
GPS
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a GPS
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 system on our mobile phones and it can be easily navigated in a couple of seconds and the exact route and mode of transport will show on display. So it is easy for everyone to access.
Although
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 there were conventional ways of medicines available in the past, modern technology plays a vital role in human
lives
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 in hospitals.
Moreover
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, nowadays many people are going through heart diseases
such
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 as heart diseases, kidney failure, liver transplanting, cancer, eye transplanting etc. If someone has a clog in blood vessels, doctors can easily insert a nanorobot into their body to perform surgery very quickly by guiding the robot from a computer. In conclusion, the most prominent goal of
science
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 should be to improve and enhance human
lives
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. it contributes in various ways
such
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 as GPS systems to navigate
in
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apply
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transport and logistics
,
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 and to save a significant amount of diseased people in the healthcare industry.
Submitted by thanushan.kulathasan on

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supported main points
Ensure that all ideas presented are fully developed and well-supported. Expand on the examples given to explain how they improve people's lives in more depth.
logical structure
Work to enhance the logical flow between paragraphs, making transitions smoother to better connect your points.
clear comprehensive ideas
Polish sentences to ensure clarity and avoid repetition (e.g., 'going through heart diseases such as heart diseases'). Revising for grammar and punctuation accuracy will help in this regard.
introduction conclusion present
Clear introduction and conclusion, effectively framing the essay.
relevant specific examples
Good use of specific and relevant examples, particularly the GPS and medical innovations.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • crucial role
  • enhancing
  • quality of human life
  • advancements
  • medicine
  • healthcare
  • scientific research
  • solving societal problems
  • improving living standards
  • global issues
  • climate change
  • food scarcity
  • technological advancements
  • limitations
  • negative consequences
  • ethical considerations
  • sustainability
  • environmental preservation
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