Some people think that Olympic games are exciting events that bring other nations together. Others say Olympics is a waste of money and the money could be better spent on other things. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In today's world, some
people
believe that the
Olympic
Games
help bring nations together.
However
, others think that the
money
used for the
Olympics
could be better spent on other things.
This
essay will discuss both viewpoints and provide my opinion.
To begin
with, the
Olympic
Games
draw many international visitors.
This
provides a chance for them to meet and talk with local
people
and to appreciate the host country's culture. When visitors have a positive view of a country, it can help build good relationships between nations.
For example
, when Japan hosted the
Olympic
Games
in 2020, many foreign visitors gained a high respect for Japan, which strengthened Japan's connection with other countries.
On the other hand
, the
Olympics
do not directly benefit society, especially the poor. The lives of poor
people
do not improve because of the
Olympics
; their situation remains unchanged.
Therefore
, spending a lot of
money
on organizing the
Olympics
can be seen as wasteful.
This
is why some
people
argue that the
money
could be better spent
elsewhere
. In my view, the
Olympics
do not significantly impact major global issues
such
as war or poverty.
Moreover
, some countries use the
Olympics
to compete against or tarnish the reputation of their rivals.
Instead
, the
money
used for the
Olympics
could be better used to help poor countries or address global problems. In conclusion, I believe that the
money
spent on organizing the
Olympic
Games
should be used for other purposes, as the event does not bring significant benefits.
Thus
, it is worth considering whether the
Olympics
should continue to be held.
Submitted by [email protected] on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence
You have a clear introduction and conclusion, which is excellent. However, in some parts, the flow of ideas could be smoother. Consider using more linking phrases to connect your ideas seamlessly.
task response
Your main points are well-supported with examples, but there is room to further develop these points. Adding more detail and expanding on your arguments could strengthen your essay.
task response
You provided a balanced discussion of both viewpoints and included relevant examples to support your arguments. This is a strong aspect of your essay.
coherence
Your essay has a clear and logical structure. The introduction sets the stage for the discussion, and the conclusion summarizes your stance effectively.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Promotes global unity
  • Cultural exchange
  • Economic benefits
  • Job creation
  • Tourism
  • Infrastructure
  • Active lifestyle
  • Financial undertaking
  • Economic burden
  • Underutilization
  • Wasted resources
  • White elephants
  • Opportunity cost
  • Critical areas
  • Social welfare
What to do next:
Look at other essays: