The graph below shos the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparizons where relevant.
The line chart illustrated the closures and opening of
shops
through 7 years from 2011 tell 2018 in a country. Use synonyms
Overall
, in 2011 Linking Words
was
the highest point of opening Unnecessary verb
apply
shops
Use synonyms
it
was about 8000 and as for the closuresCorrect pronoun usage
apply
Verb problem
,
shop
was in 2013 the highest amount of Use synonyms
Use synonyms
shop
closed.
Fix the agreement mistake
shops
To begin
with the opening Linking Words
shop
we can notice that it Use synonyms
was fluctuated
through the years, it started Change to the active voice
fluctuated
has fluctuated
on
2013 at the highest point which was about 8000 and sharply decreased Change preposition
in
on
2012 to reach less than 4000 which it decreased around 50% and Change preposition
in
then
continued rising to reached above 6000 in 2014 to facing a drop again in 2015 to bee 4000, Linking Words
then
continued slowly increasing tell it Linking Words
face
another Add the particle
to face
highly
drop in 2018 to be 3000 of opening Change the adverb
high
shops
.
As for the closure Use synonyms
Use synonyms
Change preposition
of shop
shop
in Fix the agreement mistake
shops
2013
it was the highest number of closing Add a comma
2013,
shops
above 7000. Followed by dropping sharply in 2015 to reach less than 1000. To rise again steadily to reach just above 5000 in 2018.
In conclusion, we can notice that the both closure and opening Use synonyms
shop
Use synonyms
has
a lot of Correct subject-verb agreement
have
up
and Replace the word
ups
down
Replace the word
downs
in
Change preposition
apply
it
. But for the opening Correct pronoun usage
apply
shops
Use synonyms
start
at Wrong verb form
started
high
amount just above 8000 in 2011 and ended in 2018 by reaching 3000 Add an article
a high
shops
. Use synonyms
However
, the closing Linking Words
Use synonyms
shops
reached the highest amount of Change preposition
of shops
shops
in 2013 above 7000 and ended in 2018 with a Use synonyms
slowly increasing
Replace the word
slow increase
at
above 5000.Change preposition
to
Submitted by fofo-_-qtr on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words shops, shop with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "drop" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "reach" was used 5 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "slowly" was used 2 times.
▼