IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

The diagram below shows the environmental issues raised by a product over its life cycle. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The diagram below shows the environmental issues raised by a product over its life cycle. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#product #life #cycle #information #features #comparisons
The diagram below illustrates the problem of environmental
incresed
Correct your spelling
increase
 by
a goods
Correct the article-noun agreement
a good
goods
show examples
 over its life cycle.
Overall
, it can be seen those of seven
process
Change to a plural noun
processes
show examples
. Starting from the consumption of
meterials
Correct your spelling
materials
 and energy resources.
Then
 The
last
stages
Fix the agreement mistake
stage
show examples
 the
product
 will be
recyled
Correct your spelling
recycled
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
them. Regarding the picture,
at
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the first step of the
process
,
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
is planning and
design
Wrong verb form
designing
show examples
product
Correct article usage
a product
show examples
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
they
Correct pronoun usage
that
show examples
 can
sended
Wrong verb form
be sent
show examples
 by container car.
Then
 Consumption of
meterials
Correct your spelling
materials
 and energy resources that of
product
 to
sent
Change the form of the verb
send
show examples
 the factory. And
then
,
production
Correct article usage
the production
show examples
process
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
can
made
Wrong verb form
make
show examples
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
goods in
home
Correct article usage
the home
show examples
 industry to prepare
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 good quality
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
product
. After that,
this
process
packaging
Change preposition
of packaging
show examples
 and distribution to ensure the good
fulffil standars
Correct your spelling
full standards
 before
send
Change the verb form
sending
show examples
 to
costumers
Correct your spelling
customers
show examples
. The five stages
sales
Change preposition
of sales
show examples
 can be selling good for
costumers
Correct your spelling
customers
show examples
 if
they
Correct your spelling
the
show examples
product
 is good to use. Followed by next
proscess
Correct your spelling
process
 the
product
 is been used by
costumers
Correct your spelling
customers
show examples
, so they can
disposal
Replace the word
disposed
show examples
at
Change preposition
of at
show examples
 the place landfill.
The
Change preposition
In the
show examples
 final
stages
Fix the agreement mistake
stage
show examples
 they must
ben
Correct your spelling
be
show examples
 recycling the goods after they
used
Wrong verb form
use
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
.
Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words process, product with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: