Children are facing more pressures nowadays from academic, social and commercial perspectives. What are the causes of these pressures and what measures should be taken to reduce these pressures?
Currently,
children
are undergoing various types of stress. From the writer’s perspective, the root causes for this
are due to
not only high parental expectations but also
the rapid developments of Artificial Intelligence,yet it can be tackled by having serious family conversations in
Change preposition
apply
regular
.
To commence with, the primary reason for a rise in Change the word
regularly
children
’s pressures is the responsibility for living up to the desire of parents
. In other words
, because people who are fathers or mothers could not acquire their goals when they were young, individuals literally long their
offspring to obtain these aims. Change preposition
for their
Moreover
, this
is also
since
Correct word choice
because
parents
want their children
to enter high-quality environments such
as reputable schools that can enhance their employment opportunities in the future. As a result
, children
have to satisfy their parents
undersiably
, especially those who do not have enough abilities to do as their Correct your spelling
undeniably
parents
require.
Furthermore
, another cause for the overwhelm of current children
can be attributed to the significant developments of AI. To be more specific, as AI nowadays appears in almost all aspects of human life, predominantly in occupations, children
are likely to encounter the risk of unemployment. For instance
, 13% of Japanese vehicle companies in 2020 also
fired 30000 blue-collar workers and hired many technical robots to manufacture cars, this
practice also
had negative impacts on employment opportunities for both adults and future generations.
However
, offspring’s pressures can be reduced by increasing gatherings in the families. The most effective way is for parents
to confide in their children
to comprehend more about their inner world . Consequently
, offspring can gain their parent’s sympathy for lives as well as
acquire experience in future careers, learning how to avoid the power of AI in work. Take Vietnam as an example here, where 66% of parents
in 2019 had several conversations with their children
every week and it helped 25% of teenagers navigate the pressures of academic expectations and uncertainties about the job market influenced by AI.
In conclusion, the increase in overwhelm of offspring stems from the high desire of parents
and the considerable growth of AI. Nevertheless
, having coversations
usually on a daily basis will improve Correct your spelling
conversations
this
problem.Submitted by Nghỉ hè vui vẻ cả nhà on
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task response
You have addressed the prompt with a clear introduction and conclusion. However, there could be more depth in discussing the measures to reduce pressures on children. Expanding on the solutions and providing a variety of them would strengthen your essay.
coherence cohesion
There are some areas in your essay where the connection between sentences and paragraphs could be improved. For example, using more cohesive devices and transitional phrases would enhance the flow of your essay.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which helps in understanding your argument better.
task response
The examples given, such as those from Japan and Vietnam, help in illustrating your points and make your essay more convincing.