Some countries achieve international sports by building specialised facilities to train top athletes, instead of providing sports facilities that everyone can use. Do you think this is positive or negative development? Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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There aren'
t
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providing
Verb problem
apply
show examples
sports
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facilities
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that
everyone
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can
use
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in some
countries
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.
While
Linking Words
some
countries
Use synonyms
have
providing
Change the verb form
to provide
show examples
sports
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areas for
eveyone
Correct your spelling
everyone
. the other
countries
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don'
t
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care
society
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about society
show examples
and they only focus
to
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on
show examples
top
athletes
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. I strongly agree
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct determiner usage
that
show examples
everyone
Use synonyms
can
use
Use synonyms
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
sports
Use synonyms
facilities
Use synonyms
and in
this
Linking Words
essay, both views will be discussed and my own opinion will be stated. On the one hand, that decision is sensible because
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
good
athletes
Use synonyms
should be discovered and supported by the government. They should
do
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
train in
better
Add an article
a better
show examples
environment. They can improve better themselves thanks to that structure and areas. There are a lot of good
athletes
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in many
countries
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but they don'
t
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have enough area and materials because of economic crisis. If
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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the government make these buildings, the top
athletes
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can represent
to
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apply
show examples
their country.
On the other hand
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, that decision shouldn'
t
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be
done
Verb problem
made
show examples
and the government
shold
Correct your spelling
should
be built
sports
Use synonyms
facilities
Use synonyms
that
everyone
Use synonyms
can
use
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.
Thus
Linking Words
,
everyone
Use synonyms
can do
sports
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activities.
Countries
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should think not only
Change preposition
of top
show examples
top
Change preposition
of top
show examples
athletes
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but
also
Linking Words
Change preposition
of other
show examples
other
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of other
show examples
people. These areas can be used by society
instead
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of only top
athletes
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.
According to
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research conducted,
countries
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which do
sports
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are more
Correct your spelling
successful
succesfull
Correct your spelling
successful
and healthier than other
countries
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I don'
t
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agree with
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
that project because
think
Wrong verb form
thinking
show examples
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
only top
athletes
Use synonyms
is
ridicolous
Correct your spelling
ridiculous
. If
that
Change the determiner
those
show examples
buildins
Correct your spelling
buildings
building
are used by society, there will
more
Add a missing verb
be more
show examples
athletes
Use synonyms
in
countries
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and more
athletes
Use synonyms
are
Wrong verb form
will be
show examples
discovered by
coachs
Correct your spelling
coaches
coach
.
Whereras
Correct your spelling
Whereas
,
everyone
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don'
Change the verb form
doesn't
show examples
t
Use synonyms
have enough economic situation. To put it in a nutshell, there are different ideas and there aren'
t
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sports
Use synonyms
facilities
Use synonyms
that
everyone
Use synonyms
can
use
Use synonyms
, these
building
Fix the agreement mistake
buildings
show examples
for
Add a missing verb
are for
show examples
only top
athletes
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by svdnruslu on

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coherence cohesion
The essay should include a clearer and more concise introduction. It currently lacks coherence and has some grammatical errors.
task achievement
Expand on your points with specific examples and details to strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
Use linking words and phrases to improve the flow and connection between sentences and paragraphs.
task achievement
Avoid repetitive statements and focus on presenting unique ideas for each paragraph to enhance clarity and engagement.
task achievement
The essay discusses both views, providing a balanced perspective on the topic.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion effectively summarizes the writer's opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • specialised facilities
  • train top athletes
  • international sports
  • boost
  • reputation
  • attract
  • sporting events
  • access
  • general public
  • inequality
  • opportunities
  • overemphasis
  • elite sports
  • neglect
  • grassroots development
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