An Australian company offers money to foreign students to study in Australia. Write a letter to the company: -introduce yourself -say what you want to study -how the money will help you

#australian #company #money #students #study #australia #-introduce #-say #-how

Dear Sir, I am writing

this

letter apropos the

scholarship

of $20000, which is being offered by your Hilton Education Era Company. I found your website link on my university

scholarship

tab. Let me apprise you with my introduction, I am Jacob, a resident of William Street Colony, New Zealand. I have completed my

Master’

Correct your spelling

Master’s

show examples

degree in Business Studies with 8.5 CGP and scored first place and a gold medal at the Saint John Business University of Auckland.

Further

, I want to join the PMP, Project Management Professional course because

this

course can help me join international companies and a pragmatic knowledge of project handling and preparation. Having said that, as

this

course is in demand, it has a total cost of $ 28000 and I just have $8000.

Therefore

, it is being requested that kindly allow me a chance to grab

this

scholarship

and inform me if there is any test for

this

. I assure you that I will never waste a single penny of

this

scholarship

and it will be a great help to ensure the efficacy of my professional career. I will be very beholden to you for

this

and hope for a quick response from your side. Yours faithfully, Jacob Brown.

Submitted by Mrjit147 on Tue Jun 04 2024

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task achievement

There are a few minor grammatical mistakes such as 'Master’s degree' should be before 'Business Studies' and the use of CGP instead of CGPA.

coherence cohesion

A brief introduction of your past achievements should be included to strengthen your case.

suitable writing tone

Your letter is very polite and follows a formal tone, which is suitable for this type of request.

single idea per paragraph

Your paragraphs are mostly well-organized, each focusing on a single idea, which enhances readability.

logical structure

The logical structure of your letter is clear, making it easy for the reader to follow your points.

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3Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

7 paragraphs

205 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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An Australian company offers money to foreign students to study in Australia. Write a letter to the company: -introduce yourself -say what you want to study -how the money will help you

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Computers and A.I. technology are increasingly being used for online education. Can artificial intelligence enhance the learning experience? Is this a positive or negative development?

Nowadays more people are living by themselves. What are the reasons for this? Will this have a negative or a positive impact on the society?

Some people say that in all levels of education, from primary schools to university, too much time is spent on learning facts and not enough on learning practical skills. Do you agree or disagree ?

Topic : Some people think that environmental problems are too big for individuals to solve. Others believe that individuals also can do some things to solve these problems. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.