An Australian company offers money to foreign students to study in Australia. Write a letter to the company: -introduce yourself -say what you want to study -how the money will help you

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Dear Sir, I am writing
this
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letter apropos the
scholarship
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of $20000, which is being offered by your Hilton Education Era Company. I found your website link on my university
scholarship
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tab. Let me apprise you with my introduction, I am Jacob, a resident of William Street Colony, New Zealand. I have completed my
Master’
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Master’s
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degree in Business Studies with 8.5 CGP and scored first place and a gold medal at the Saint John Business University of Auckland.
Further
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, I want to join the PMP, Project Management Professional course because
this
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course can help me join international companies and a pragmatic knowledge of project handling and preparation. Having said that, as
this
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course is in demand, it has a total cost of $ 28000 and I just have $8000.
Therefore
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, it is being requested that kindly allow me a chance to grab
this
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scholarship
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and inform me if there is any test for
this
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. I assure you that I will never waste a single penny of
this
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scholarship
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and it will be a great help to ensure the efficacy of my professional career. I will be very beholden to you for
this
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and hope for a quick response from your side. Yours faithfully, Jacob Brown.
Submitted by Mrjit147 on

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task achievement
There are a few minor grammatical mistakes such as 'Master’s degree' should be before 'Business Studies' and the use of CGP instead of CGPA.
coherence cohesion
A brief introduction of your past achievements should be included to strengthen your case.
suitable writing tone
Your letter is very polite and follows a formal tone, which is suitable for this type of request.
single idea per paragraph
Your paragraphs are mostly well-organized, each focusing on a single idea, which enhances readability.
logical structure
The logical structure of your letter is clear, making it easy for the reader to follow your points.
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