IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

The bar chart provides information about how families in a country spent weekly income in both 1968 and in 2018.

The bar chart provides information about how families in a country spent weekly income in both 1968 and in 2018.
#bar #information #families #country #income
The
given
Verb problem
apply
show examples
bar graph gives data on the parents in an
areas
Fix the agreement mistake
area
show examples
 expenditure for weekly salary over a period 50-year from 1986 to 2018. It can be seen from the graph that the spending
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
 food in 1986
higher
Add a missing verb
was higher
show examples
 than
others section
Fix the agreement mistake
other sections
show examples
. At the
begin in
Correct your spelling
beginning
show examples
 the personal goods of families had hit the lowest point after 50 years. In terms of payment for housing significantly increased from 10
percent
 in 1986 to 19 units in 2018. The figure spent
of
Change preposition
on
show examples
 household goods still
stay
Change the verb form
stays
show examples
 the same.
Conversely
, the number of transport
rocket
Fix the agreement mistake
rockets
show examples
 approximately 11
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 between 1986 and 2018. Regarding
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
debt their weekly income
about
Change preposition
in
show examples
 leisure hat hit the highest point
about
Change preposition
of about
show examples
 13
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
. Looking at the chart more closely, we can see food
play
Correct subject-verb agreement
plays
show examples
an
Change the article
apply
show examples
important in
family
Add an article
the family
a family
show examples
, it is evident that the count for food rapidly declined with 35 and 17
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 for 1986 and 2018 respectively.
Overall
, the quantity
fuel
Change preposition
of fuel
show examples
 and power and personal goods downward trend substantially.
Besides
, the total sector’s clothing and footwear
decrease
Wrong verb form
decreased
show examples
 from 10 to 5
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
.
Submitted by quynhtranhbh on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Vocabulary: Replace the words percent with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: