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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Chorleywood is a village near London whose population has increased steadily since the middle of the 19th century. The map below shows the development of the village.

Chorleywood is a village near London whose population has increased steadily since the middle of the 19th century. The map below shows the development of the village.
#chorleywood #village #london #population #middle #century #development
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The following illustrations
illustrates
Change the verb form
illustrate
show examples
 the development of the London nearby city known as Chorleywood
Use synonyms
village
Capitalize word
Village
show examples
 in order to support the outburst of
populations
Fix the agreement mistake
population
show examples
 between 1868 and 1994. The constructions added throughout the given time frame will be elaborated on in
detailed
Change the form of the verb
detail
show examples
 in the next paragraph.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be clearly observed that in late 19th century period reached
it
Correct pronoun usage
its
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 maximum expansions with numerous
infractures
Correct your spelling
infrastructures
 and public
transporations
Correct your spelling
transportation
transportations
, whilst
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
of in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the early phase
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
accounted for
small
Add an article
a small
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 area and two main roads.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, in 1868-1883, Chorleywood
village
Use synonyms
 was only a small community situated next to the main road where its ending
intersect
Wrong verb form
intersected
show examples
 with the other road.
However
Linking Words
, it is interesting to
noted
Change the form of the verb
note
show examples
 that the introduction of
railways
Correct article usage
the railways
show examples
 station in 1909 in the southern part of the
village
Use synonyms
 where its rails passed through the city from East to West. With
this
Linking Words
 new form of
transportations
Fix the agreement mistake
transportation
show examples
, it attracted
number
Change the article
a number
the number
show examples
 of
peoples
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
 which
making
Wrong verb form
made
show examples
 its area
expanded
Wrong verb form
expand
show examples
 toward the south in 1883-1922. In
reagrds
Correct your spelling
regard
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
,
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
1922-1970,
due to
Linking Words
 the
emerge
Replace the word
emergence
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 of railways station,
not
Add a missing verb
was not
show examples
 only
bring
Wrong verb form
brought
show examples
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 new means of transportation but
also
Linking Words
 the residents created
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
communities near
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the station
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 the bottom of the map.
Moreover
Linking Words
, in 1970,
a
Change the article
an
show examples
 express lane called Motor
way
Capitalize word
Way
show examples
 was built
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
1970, leading
Change preposition
to the
show examples
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 skyrocketed burst of populations living along
this
Linking Words
 long
fast track
Add a hyphen
fast-track
show examples
 lane in the East of the
village
Use synonyms
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, There
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
also
Linking Words
 a park and golf course located in the central part of the map.
Submitted by kamonluck1999 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words village with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "map" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Steadily
  • Pivotal events
  • Significant change
  • Transportation links
  • Commuter village
  • Residential areas
  • Commercial areas
  • Public facilities
  • Infrastructure
  • Environmental impact
  • Community life
  • Conservation efforts
  • Maintaining character
  • Vicinity
  • Unique aspects
  • Common challenges
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