The influence of human beings on the world’s ecosystem is leading to the extinction of species and loss of biodiversity. Causes? Solutions?
Human’s
activities have brought about Change noun form
Human
immense
impact on the environment regarding biodiversity loss. The writer believes that Correct article usage
an immense
this
situation stems from the destruction of habitats caused by deforestation and illegal poaching, which can be addressed by the promotion of national parks.
One of the core reasons that lead to the disappearance of numerous animals is the destruction of their natural habitats. Simply put, a large amount forests
Change preposition
of forests
has
been Correct subject-verb agreement
have
sarcrified
to the expansion of farmland and unauthorized logging, which Correct your spelling
sacrificed
also
means the living spaces of various species
are reduced all because of the selfishness of human
.Fix the agreement mistake
humans
Consequently
, their only way to survive is to move to another environments
, potentially resulting in fights between the local and new Replace the adjective
another environment
other environments
species
which deteriorate
the problem even more. Correct subject-verb agreement
deteriorates
For instance
, the illegal exploitation at
the Amazon Change preposition
of
rain forest
is known to not only Correct your spelling
rainforest
damages
the jungle itselfWrong verb form
damage
,
but Remove the comma
apply
also
influences
the immigration of invasive Correct subject-verb agreement
influence
species
into nearby areas.
Perhaps the establishment of more nature conservation parks can help to mitigate this
issue. To explain further
, eventhough
it is impossible to stop deforestation entirely, the governments can still maintain the Correct your spelling
even though
biodiverity
of their country’s nature by only focusing on protecting important zones which contain the animals and living conditions Correct your spelling
biodiversity
that
is
typical for their nations, in order to do that, tight restrictions have to be applied in the conserved lands to eliminate not only the pervasiveness of forest poachers but Change the verb form
are
also
the devastation of jungles for agricultural purposes. Therefore
, the more developed Wildlife Sanctuary becomes, the more benefits brought to these endangered species
.
In conclusion, the upsurge of loss in the variety of species
is the consequence of their habitats being devastated. However
, by the exploit of ecological reserve spaces, this
problem can be tackled.Submitted by Nghỉ hè vui vẻ cả nhà on
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task achievement
While the essay addresses the main causes (deforestation and illegal poaching) and provides a potential solution (the establishment of more nature conservation parks), further elaboration on these points could strengthen the argument. Including more specific examples and statistical data can enhance the task achievement.
task achievement
Ensure clarity in your points by avoiding overly complex sentences. Breaking long sentences into shorter, more digestible parts can improve clarity and comprehension. Additionally, a clear topic sentence for each paragraph can help guide the reader through your argument.
coherence cohesion
Work on grammatical accuracy, particularly subject-verb agreement and article usage. For instance, "amount forests" should be "amount of forests" and "contain the animals" should be "contain animals". These small changes can significantly impact the readability and professionalism of your writing.
coherence cohesion
Clarify and separate your ideas more explicitly. For example, start a new paragraph when discussing different mains ideas, such as moving from the explanation of causes to discussing solutions. This improves the flow and structure of the essay.
structure
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which provides a good structure and frame for the argument.
content
The main points are relevant to the topic and are generally well-supported by explanation and reasoning.
content
The idea of promoting national parks as a solution is well-thought-out and is a practical approach to tackling the problem of biodiversity loss.
Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic
Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.
You essay structure should look something like this:
- Introduction
- Body paragraph 1 – Problems
- Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
- Conclusion
Examples to start your body paragraph:
- One of the first problems of the...
- Another problem that needs to be considered...
- A possible solution to this problem would be...
- One immediate practical solution is to...