Many people decide on a career path early in their lives and keep to it. This they argue, leads to a more satisfying working life. To what extent do you agree with this view? What other things can people do in order to have a satisfying working life?
In the eyes of some, focusing on the early chosen career path guarantees satisfaction in their working
lives
. In my opinion, as modern technologies develops
really fast, Change the verb form
develop
job
markets may vary through time, hence
, people
should be able to adapt to changes, especially professionally. In addition
, maintaining work-life
balance and securing a Correct article usage
a work-life
job
with colleaguses
who share the same values Correct your spelling
colleagues
also
plays
an important part in the Correct subject-verb agreement
play
acquire
of a satisfying working life.
In the contemporary era, technology has become an integral part of Wrong verb form
acquiring
everyday's
Change noun form
everyday
lives
. The advancement in technology leads to rapid changes in the job
market. For example
, Artificial Intelligence is emerging and replacing how people
do certain jobs, from advertising to computer coding. Hence
, individuals should be flexible and open-minded to learn and adjust their career pathways accordingly
to the new era. With this
mindset, people
will be prepared to make any necessary adaption in order to find satisfaction in their professional lives
.
Moreover
, in order to be satisfied with their careers, it is essential to aim for work
-life balance. In fact,the importance of having a healthy lifestyle beside
Change preposition
besides
work
is stressed by various research, saying that young professionals need to spend time on
nurturing their personal Change preposition
apply
lives
, such
as doing physical exercises or sharing quality times
with friends and families. Those activities will help refresh their minds and revitalise their Fix the agreement mistake
time
creativities
and passion for Replace the word
creativity
work
, which will eventually provide productivity in their careers. In addition
, another factor people
might want to look into is finding a suitable working environment. As different organisations are built around different working cultures, with different core values, it is fundamental to look for a workplace that shares the same value
, which will help boost one's passion for the Fix the agreement mistake
values
job
.
In conclusion, I believe thar
Correct your spelling
that
people
should be flexible and preapre
to change jobs to quickly adapt Correct your spelling
prepare
prepared
in
the fast-growing digital era. Change preposition
to
Moreover
, beside
the nature of the Replace the word
besides
work
, individuals should look for a suitable working cultures
and aim to maintain a balanced life after Correct the article-noun agreement
a suitable working culture
suitable working cultures
work
.Submitted by kimtruong270192 on
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task achievement
Your essay effectively addresses the task by discussing the flexibility required in modern job markets and how maintaining a work-life balance and finding a suitable work environment can lead to job satisfaction. However, try to introduce more specific examples to substantiate your points better.
coherence cohesion
While your essay contains a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion, ensure that all main points are fully developed and supported. For example, you mention how colleagues who share the same values play an important role but do not elaborate much on this point.
coherence cohesion
There are a few grammatical errors and awkward phrases that slightly disrupt the flow of your essay. Be sure to proofread your work for minor mistakes like 'preapre,' 'everyday's,' and 'colleaguses.'
logical structure
Your essay has a clear and well-organized structure, which aids in the overall readability and flow of your arguments.
introduction conclusion present
You have a clear introduction and conclusion, which effectively frame your essay and reinforce your main points.
supported main points
The points about rapid technological advancements and the necessity for flexibility in career paths are well-made and relevant to the topic.
clear comprehensive ideas
The discussion on work-life balance and finding a workplace that shares similar values adds depth to your argument, contributing to a comprehensive response.