Computers are often argued to be the most important invention of the last hundred years. To what extent do you agree or diagree with this statment

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Some argue that the most crucial improvement of the
last
century is computing. I fully agree with the former view and will demonstrate why I chose
this
view in the following paragraphs. There is no doubt that modern electronic devices help
everyday
Correct article usage
the everyday
show examples
life of a human being greatly. Robots which are made of computers are already becoming a nonreplacing part of our modern lifestyle. By
this
I mean,
automation
Correct word choice
that automation
show examples
of chores by several tools like robots has replaced human power and women love them already.
In addition
, these electronic items are commonly used in the education sector to achieve higher productivity.
In particular
, the advancements of AI and the new technology by Apple called "spatial computing"
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
helping youngsters to learn
easier
Rephrase
more easily
show examples
and will
make
Verb problem
have
show examples
a significant effect on our future.
Submitted by musayevjahangir on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Your essay has a clear position, and you provide some supporting reasons for your view. However, ensure you fully develop your points with more detailed explanations and relevant examples to strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure is fairly good, but make sure to clearly outline the main points in distinct paragraphs. Also, consider adding a conclusion that summarizes your key arguments.
coherence cohesion
Try to use a wider range of connective phrases and transition words to link your ideas more smoothly and cohesively.
task achievement
You have provided a clear position on the topic, which is important in task response.
coherence cohesion
Your writing demonstrates a good attempt at organizing ideas logically.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • revolutionized
  • interconnected
  • innovation
  • democratization
  • accessibility
  • simulations
  • data analysis
  • artificial intelligence
  • digital collaboration
  • remote work
  • productivity
  • virtual classrooms
  • educational software
  • streaming services
  • leisure
  • scientific research
What to do next:
Look at other essays: