Some people think that keeping pets is good for children while others think it is dangerous and unhealthy. Which opinion do you agree with? Discuss both options and give examples

In recent times, there has been a significant rise in the number of people rearing
pets
.
While
some claim that it is hazardous and not healthy to keep them, others argue that keeping
pets
has potential benefits for kids.
This
essay will delve into both perspectives impartially,without favouring one side over the other. On one hand, those who advocate for keeping
pets
claim that
pets
offer companionship and friendship to children and a family as a whole, they argue that these domesticated animals can engage in physical activities with the youngsters
such
as playing
asports
Correct your spelling
sports
and taking walks with them, thereby, combating the desire to always opt for screen-based entertainment which can lead to the adoption of a sedentary lifestyle. A sedentary lifestyle has been linked to health and mental
complication
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complications
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such
as obesity, sleep disturbance and lack of social skills.
Moreover
,
pets
can be trained to protect kids against danger.
This
is an essential skill as it plays an
intrustmental
Correct your spelling
instrumental
role in alleviating stress levels among caregivers in the event that they face a dangerous situation.
Conversely
, proponents against rearing
pets
claim that
pets
carry diseases and infectious that are contagious,
This
can pose a health hazard to minors whose immune
system
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systems
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is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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still developing and cannot combat infection effectively.
Additionally
, some
pets
such
as dogs and cats can harbour parasites
such
as ticks which can bite these children leading to allergic reactions or serious illness. To address
this
issue,it is indispensable that pet owners
oblige
Verb problem
undergo
show examples
routine veterinary visits and immunisation. In conclusion, both arguments are valuable and the debate is complex. I firmly believe that there is a need to strike a balance. It is undeniable that
pets
offer a sense of security and companionship,
however
, the drawbacks of disease transmission cannot be understated. Ultimately, the decision to keep
pets
solely depends on an individual's preference and
Submitted by shantalesiyoni23 on

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coherence cohesion
To improve coherence and cohesion, work on refining your transitions between ideas. Sentences should flow more smoothly from one to the next to improve the overall readability.
task achievement
Enhance your task response by fully developing your conclusions. Ensure both perspectives are equally elaborated, and provide a balanced final opinion.
task achievement
Aim to provide more specific, relevant examples to support your main ideas. This can make your arguments more convincing and concrete.
task achievement
Your essay provides a balanced discussion of both perspectives, which contributes to a well-rounded task response.
supported main points
The points you made about pets combating sedentary lifestyles and offering protection to children are well-supported and highly relevant.
introduction conclusion present
Your introduction clearly states the topic and sets up both sides of the argument, which helps in guiding the reader through your essay.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • companion
  • responsibility
  • care
  • empathy
  • compassion
  • social skills
  • transmit
  • diseases
  • allergies
  • safety risks
  • time
  • effort
  • money
  • mature
  • handle
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