Many people in poor countries die from diseases that are curable because they cannot afford the medication required. Do you believe that drug companies should make their products available at reduced prices in these countries?
Research has shown that a lot of poor population die every year
due to
the high Linking Words
prices
of many medicines. An idea about reducing the percentage of deaths in poor countries is Use synonyms
drug
Use synonyms
companies
to decrease the Use synonyms
prices
of their products which are sold in areas with low levels of wealth. Obviously, Use synonyms
this
idea will be helpful for poor humans for plenty of reasons.
To start with, Linking Words
companies
which produce drugs choose to sell them at high Use synonyms
prices
because of the high demand and need for them. Of course, selling a product at the highest price that it can be sold, is the best way for Use synonyms
companies
to be rich. Use synonyms
For instance
, a new medicine for cancer is logical to be sold as gold because it will be unique and will save a lot of lives.
Linking Words
On the other hand
, if Linking Words
drug
factories and Use synonyms
companies
think about people who cannot afford the cost of their products and the right of those people to live equally as the others, they will decline the Use synonyms
prices
. Use synonyms
This
can happen, as I mentioned previously, because the Linking Words
companies
choose to sell their drugs at the highest potential price and of course, there is the possibility to sell them at lower Use synonyms
prices
without a significant loss. Use synonyms
For example
, a new Linking Words
drug
can be sold from $10 to $30. Obviously, Use synonyms
companies
will sell it at the price of 30$ but they can Use synonyms
also
offer it for $10 with a loss of $20. Linking Words
However
, they will cover the expenditures of the Linking Words
drug
production even though they lose money.
Use synonyms
To conclude
, I am of the opinion that Linking Words
companies
should reduce the Use synonyms
prices
of their products if they want to help a lot of people who live in bad living conditions. They can do it with a slight loss of their income but it will be for a good reason, raising the health expectancy. Use synonyms
Thus
, why not to help the humanity?Linking Words
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task achievement
Your task response is generally good, as you have addressed the question and provided a clear opinion. However, it can be improved by providing more detailed and specific arguments. For example, you could elaborate on the economic implications for drug companies and the potential long-term benefits for society if medications were made more affordable.
coherence cohesion
The coherence and cohesion of your essay are reasonable, but there are areas that need improvement. Your essay follows a logical structure, but some transitions between ideas and paragraphs could be smoother. For instance, connecting sentences that summarize the main points at the end of each paragraph would help to reinforce your arguments. Additionally, using more cohesive devices (e.g., furthermore, moreover, consequently) can enhance the flow of your essay.
coherence cohesion
Your essay includes a clear introduction and conclusion, which provide a solid framework for your argument. This enhances the readability and overall structure of your essay.
task achievement
You have successfully identified the main issue and provided reasons and examples to support your opinion, which shows a good understanding of the task.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.