You have been working as a Manager in a private company for the last two years with no salary raise. Write a letter to your manager to request a pay equity in your salary as compared to other managers in your department. In your letter, explain why you are writing why you think you deserve a salary raise say what you want your manager to do for you

Dear Manager, I hope
this
letter finds you well. My name is Teo Knockout, and I am writing to formally request you a pay equity in my salary as compared to other managers in our department. I have carefully considered the need for
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
salary raise, and after thorough consideration, I believe that I deserve a salary raise for my
hardwork
Correct your spelling
hard work
. I understand that
this
may not be easy because you do not only have
this
issue, but so many, and I am open to discussing ways to address these issues collaboratively. I am confident that by doing so we both can benefit from its results, and I believe that it will not be much of a problem, and it would positively impact our progress. Thank you for taking the time to review my request. I am more than willing to provide any additional information or clarification if needed. I look forward to the possibility of fulfilling my request and appreciate your attention to
this
matter. Yours faithfully, Teo Knockout.
Submitted by Teo Halimov on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
While you have clearly stated your request and the reason behind it, providing specific examples of your contributions and achievements could strengthen your case.
task achievement
Make sure to clearly explain why you think you deserve the raise, detailing your skills, achievements and contributions to the company.
coherence cohesion
The letter could benefit from smoother transitions between ideas for better readability. For instance, connecting your opening statement to the reasoning for your raise request more effectively can enhance coherence.
coherence cohesion
Consider separating longer paragraphs to ensure each discusses a single idea for better clarity.
task achievement
The tone of the letter is polite and professional, which is very suitable for this type of request.
coherence cohesion
The greeting and closing are appropriate and courteous.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: