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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The diagram below shows the process for recycling plastic bottles. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The diagram below shows the process for recycling plastic bottles. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
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The diagram here illustrates the recycling cycle of
plastic
Use synonyms
bottles
Use synonyms
 in nine consecutive steps.
Overall
Linking Words
, the process can be
devided
Correct your spelling
divided
 into three
seperate
Correct your spelling
separate
 phases, from collection to
compress
Replace the word
compression
show examples
, from crushing to pellet,
from
Correct word choice
and from
show examples
 pellet to final product. The recycling procedure of
plastic
Use synonyms
bottles
Use synonyms
start
Change the verb form
starts
show examples
 with dumping these
bottles
Use synonyms
 in bins which are specific for recycling. From there the recycling
dump-truck
Correct your spelling
dump truck
show examples
 collects and transports them to
recycling
Add an article
a recycling
the recycling
show examples
 plant. Here, these
bottles
Use synonyms
 are sorted
in
Change preposition
into
show examples
 different sections.
Then
Linking Words
 it is compressed into blocks. In
next
Correct article usage
the next
show examples
 step, the blocks are run through a crusher to shred
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
into small pieces, followed by washing, in order to rinse
of
Replace the word
off
show examples
 dust and other unwanted substances.
Then
Linking Words
 these small pieces are put in a pellet machine to make
plastic
Use synonyms
 pellets. The
plastic
Use synonyms
 pellets are heated in the following step to produce raw materials for
plastic
Use synonyms
.
Linking Words
Finally
Add a comma
Finally,
show examples
 the raw materials are used to fabricate various types of
plastic
Use synonyms
 products for use.

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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the fifth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words plastic, bottles with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 2 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fifth paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Recycling process
  • Disposal
  • Collection
  • Sorting
  • Cleaning
  • Contaminants
  • Recycling center
  • Plastic flakes
  • Melting
  • Re-shaping
  • Raw materials
  • Transformation
  • Repurposing
  • End products
  • Variety
  • Sustainability
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