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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

In some countries, not enough students are choosing science subjects for study. What are the causes behind this issue? What are the effects of this on society?

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Nowadays, fewer
students
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 are choosing
science
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subjects
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 for their studies.
This
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 essay will discuss the main causes of
this
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 trend and examine its effects on society. One of the primary reasons why
students
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 avoid
science
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subjects
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 is that they are often considered difficult and demanding.
Science
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 courses usually require a strong understanding of complex theories, mathematical calculations, and practical laboratory work.
As a result
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, many
students
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 prefer
subjects
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 that they find easier to study and achieve high grades in. Another reason is that
students
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 today have greater freedom to choose their fields of study
according to
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 their interests. Unlike in the past, when parents often had a strong influence on educational choices, many young people now prefer arts, business, or social
science
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subjects
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 that better match their personal preferences.
This
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 trend can have several negative effects on society.
Firstly
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, a shortage of
science
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 graduates may lead to a lack of qualified professionals in important fields
such
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 as medicine, engineering, and scientific research.
Consequently
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, countries may need to rely on foreign experts to fill these positions.
Secondly
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, a decline in the number of
science
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students
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 could reduce the level of scientific research and innovation.
This
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 may slow technological development and make it more difficult for a country to compete in the global economy. In conclusion, the main causes of the decline in
science
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 enrolment are the challenging nature of
science
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subjects
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 and
students
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’ increasing freedom to pursue their preferred fields of study. If
this
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 trend continues, societies may face shortages of skilled professionals and a reduction in scientific and technological progress.

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task response
For task response, you answer both questions well, but you can add one more clear example to make your ideas stronger.
task response
For task response, some ideas are a bit general. Try to explain one point more deeply, for example how fewer science workers can affect daily life.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, your essay is easy to follow and each paragraph has a clear job. To make it even better, add a few more linking words like 'for example' or 'because of this' in the body.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, your main points are clear, but you can develop each point a little more with a short example or result.
task response
For task response, you cover both causes and effects clearly.
task response
For task response, your conclusion matches your main ideas well.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, your essay has a clear introduction, body, and conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, your ideas move in a logical order and are easy to understand.
Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

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