Fresh water has become a global problem for the world. What are the causes of it? What measures government and individuals take to resolve to the problem? Give reasons and e.g for your answer.
The world has significant issues with
water
. This
is due to
the pollution which caused a shortage of water
supply, to solve this
problem the ministry should encourage people to stop throwing their garbage into the water
resources such
as rivers, oceans and lakes.
The main reason for the lack of water
now, that
people pollute the Add a missing verb
is that
water
with their rubbish such
as plastic, carton
and especially polythene bags. Fix the agreement mistake
cartons
Hence
, these things contain various chemicals, that can damage valuable minerals in the water
. This
means trash by stucking
there for a Correct your spelling
sticking
while
they are removing all vulnerable vitamins which might have enhanced a person's health. Furthermore
, water
can not be fixed or returned to its environment.For example
, according to
the New York Times, the most polluted ocean is the Pacific with 2 trillion plastic pieces.
To tackle this
problem the government should motivate the population to end up polluting the water
, by constructing special machines located near the beaches which can recycle plastic stuff and give an award to the person who brought that them. As a result
, by receiving money, they will be motivated to bring rubbish again. With this
solution, they will stop throwing their trash into the water
. For instance
, in Norway, volunteers invented specialized recycling machines which give 2$ to 5 cans. Through this
, they improved the condition of their beaches.
In conclusion, the main reason for the shortage of drinking water
is pollution. To solve this
problem, the government should encourage their citizens to stop throwing rubbish into the sea.Submitted by aizered097 on
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task achievement
While the essay addresses the core issue of water pollution and suggests a government and individual solution, it could benefit from a more detailed explanation of other potential causes of water shortages, such as climate change and overconsumption.
task achievement
Consider providing more varied examples and expanding on how individuals, in addition to government initiatives, can contribute to alleviating the problem.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a logical structure, but transitions between ideas can be smoother. Use linking words and phrases to connect paragraphs and ideas more effectively.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea, with supporting details and examples clearly connected to the main point. Avoid redundancy by not repeating similar ideas.
introduction conclusion present
The introduction and conclusion are both present and effectively frame the issue discussed in the essay.
relevant specific examples
The essay provides relevant examples, such as the reference to the Pacific Ocean and Norway's recycling initiative, which help illustrate the points made.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?