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some education systems make students focus on certain subjects at the age of 15 , while others require students to study a wide range of subjects until they leave school . WHat are the benefits of each systems?

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In various
education
 systems around the world, there exists a disparity in the focus of
subjects
 at the age of 15. Some systems advocate for
specialization
, where
students
 delve deeply into a narrow range of
subjects
,
while
 others emphasize a broader
education
 until the completion of schooling. Both approaches have distinct advantages.
Specialization
 at the age of 15 allows
students
 to develop expertise and proficiency
in particular
subjects
. By concentrating on a few areas,
students
 can explore complex concepts in depth, potentially leading to advanced knowledge and skill acquisition.
This
 can better prepare them for higher
education
 or specific career paths.
For instance
, in countries where
students
 choose a specialized track,
such
 as science or humanities, at 15, they often excel in their chosen fields
due to
 early exposure and focused learning.
On the other hand
, a broader
education
 until leaving school offers several benefits. Exposure to a wide range of
subjects
 cultivates a well-rounded individual with diverse skills and knowledge.
This
 interdisciplinary approach promotes critical thinking, creativity, and adaptability, which are crucial in today's rapidly evolving job market.
Additionally
, it allows
students
 to explore different interests before committing to a particular career path, potentially preventing premature
specialization
 and ensuring they make informed decisions about their future. In conclusion, both
education
 systems have their merits.
Specialization
 at 15 provides depth and expertise in chosen
subjects
,
while
 a broad
education
 fosters versatility and adaptability. Ultimately, the effectiveness of each system depends on the goals of the
education
 system and the needs of individual
students
.
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task achievement
Introduce more specific examples or case studies to support your points. Providing concrete examples strengthens your arguments and makes your essay more compelling.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next. Though your essay is generally coherent, fine-tuning the transitions would enhance the overall flow.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear and logical structure, making it easy for the reader to follow your arguments.
coherence cohesion
You have a strong introduction and conclusion, summarizing the key points effectively.
task achievement
Your ideas are clear and comprehensive, addressing the prompt in a thorough manner.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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