IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

In many countries, more and more people choose to buy imported food rather than food produced locally. Why people buy imported food. What could be done to encourage people to buy local food?

#countries #people #food
Plenty of choices are made to purchase imported
food
instead
 of local one. One possible contributory
facor
Correct your spelling
factor
 is that
people
 cannot cultivate that
food
 in their country.
However
,
quality
 improvement of local
food
 may successfully persuade citizens to consume them.
To begin
, one reason that possibly causes
people
 to buy imported
food
 is the inability to grow that
food
. The climate in a certain country is not always suitable for some seeds to have
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
growth.
For example
, durian trees are not able to be cultivated in
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
nations
are
Correct pronoun usage
that are
show examples
 not tropical or soft tropical like
Philipines
Correct article usage
the Philipines
show examples
 or Vietnam, whereby, America having
such
 a temperature climate cannot make durian as a local product.
Consequently
, the requirement
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 imported
food
 is getting higher and higher in order that
people
 can enjoy their favourite
food
. To continue,
in
Change preposition
with
show examples
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 purpose of encouraging local
people
, the
quality
 improvement of
food
 should be considered.
People
maybe
Correct your spelling
may be
show examples
 likely to consume
high
Add a hyphen
high-quality
show examples
quality
 and pesticide-free
food
 so that the consumption of local
food
 may increase when they are
adapted
Correct your spelling
adopted
show examples
.
For instance
, using fertilizer and
keep
Wrong verb form
keeping
show examples
 the
food
 in their best condition
while
 their cultivation is
occuring
Correct your spelling
occurring
.
As a result
, more dwellers are willing to buy their local
food
 when they have
such
 a high
quality
. In conclusion,
people
 tend to buy imported
food
 because of their cultivation impossibility. Contrary to
foster
Wrong verb form
fostering
show examples
food
quality
 may make the local
sonsumption
Correct your spelling
consumption
 rise.
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task response
Improve the introduction for a better overview of the essay. Providing a clear and concise thesis statement will help the reader understand the purpose of your writing.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure each paragraph transitions smoothly from one idea to the next, which will make your arguments easier to follow and more persuasive.
task response
Use more relevant and diverse examples to support your points. Examples that are closely related to the topic will make your arguments stronger.
coherence and cohesion
Check your essay for minor language errors and awkward phrasing to improve clarity.
task response
The essay covers the main points of the prompt, providing reasons why people buy imported food and suggestions on how to encourage the purchase of local food.
task response
The arguments are supported with examples, enhancing the clarity and persuasiveness of the essay.
coherence and cohesion
The essay is well-structured with clear paragraphs and a logical flow of ideas.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • allure
  • novelty
  • diversity
  • perception
  • premium
  • globalization
  • cuisines
  • economic factors
  • subsidies
  • tariffs
  • competitive
  • farm-to-table
  • eco-conscious
  • consumption
  • sustainability
  • local economy
What to do next:
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