You should spend about 40 mins. Write about the following topic: Some educationalists think that international exchange visits will benefit teenagers at school. To what extent do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Experts in education state that global
exposures
Fix the agreement mistake
exposure
show examples
will be beneficial for students at
school
. It may have some disadvantages
such
as different cultures which can contradict each other.
However
, I entirely support the idea since it will bring new
knowledges
Change the wording
knowledge
pieces of knowledge
bits of knowledge
show examples
and teach teenagers how to filter them out. From the perspective of parents, especially in Indonesia,
international
Correct article usage
an international
show examples
exchange program can be worrisome because it means their child would be exposed to new friends with, potentially, opposite backgrounds and different beliefs. It is understandable since adolescents may not
fully
Add a missing verb
be fully
show examples
capable to
distingush
Correct your spelling
distinguish
the good from the bad.
For example
, calling older people by their names will be considered impolite in Indonesia. If foreign visits can bring "bad" things that means it can
also
offer good things. Having a discussion opportunity with people from another side of the world can open up more windows for education.
This
will allow teenagers to absorb various
kind
Fix the agreement mistake
kinds
show examples
of lessons.
For instance
, I learned
making
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to make
show examples
sushi from an exchange student from Japan back in my
school
days. Some attitudes from foreign
country
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countries
show examples
may not be appropriate to apply within the native environment, but it can give the chance to the
school
for teaching their students how to filter
informations
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information
pieces of information
show examples
. In conclusion, I encourage more multinational programs at
school
. So that, students can have wider
perpectives
Correct your spelling
perspectives
perspective
and gain new
skill
Fix the agreement mistake
skills
show examples
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
embracing differences.
Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on

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task achievement
Your essay brings up strong arguments both in favor and against international exchange programs, showing a balanced view. However, try to expand more on your examples. For instance, elaborate on how learning to make sushi from a Japanese exchange student had a broader impact on your understanding or skills.
coherence cohesion
Work on improving your transitions between ideas to enhance fluidity. For example, phrases like 'On the other hand' or 'However' could help in contrasting ideas more effectively.
coherence cohesion
Focus on minimizing minor language errors for better clarity and professionalism. For instance, 'new knowledges' should be 'new knowledge' and 'distinguish the good from the bad' rather than 'distingush the good from the bad.'
task achievement
Good job on introducing the topic clearly and giving a well-rounded view of the advantages and disadvantages of international exchange programs. It shows a balanced perspective.
coherence cohesion
Your conclusion effectively summarizes key points and reiterates your support for international exchange programs, enhancing the cohesion of your essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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