In some countries, there has been an increase in the number of parents who are choosing to educate their children themselves at home instead of sending them school. Do the advantages of home education outweigh the disadvantages?

#countries #parents #children #home #school #education

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The phenomenon of teaching

children

Use synonyms

Change preposition

in at

show examples

Correct your spelling

show examples

domestic environment rather than

let

Wrong verb form

letting

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them go to school has

became

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become

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ever-increasing in recent years.

This

Linking Words

essay is devoted to

weigh

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weighing

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up the pros and cons of

this

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nation, followed by equivalent justifications. Without a shadow of a doubt, educating

children

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at home can help them avoid some adverse peer pressure in

this

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day and age. The chief of

this

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is that youngsters easily suffer from negative

behavior

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behaviour

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of their friends

such

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as smoking and violent-packed acts because they want to prove their robust characteristics like bravery. By indicating and

support

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supporting

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children

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aware

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be aware

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those mistake

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that mistake

those mistakes

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, parents can help them develop great personalities and

take

Verb problem

apply

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Correct article usage

apply

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intensive concentration

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learning

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the learning

a learning

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journey.

Hence

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, some parent

keep

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keeps

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their

childs

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children

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at home for

educating

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education

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as they can protect them from detrimental influences of society, especially at school.

While

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the benefits of teaching the

youngs

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young

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at home are widely acknowledged, it

way

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may

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do more harm than good. There is a

justificable

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justifiable

reason is

this

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way of education will hinder

children

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from improving their

communications

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communication

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skills. They are comparatively necessary since they are required to broaden social erode, which could be a valuable support when

children

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are in difficulty. To be more specific, friendships can lend

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apply

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synthetic

ears

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ear

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when youngsters have arguments with

parents

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their parents

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along with

Linking Words

Wrong verb form

sharing

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same

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the same

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interest

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interests

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to cultivate their potential talents.

Thus

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, if

children

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can not access

schooling

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the schooling

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system they will

lost

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lose

be lost

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significant set of

skill

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skills

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for

humans

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human

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lives. In conclusion, the drawbacks of

this

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perspective may overshadow the merits. So it is advisable for people to have chances to go to school at

their

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early

ages

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age

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in order to develop fully in all factors.

Submitted by hominhtrang995 on Sat Jun 08 2024

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task response

You did a good job approaching the topic and presented a clear position on whether the advantages of home education outweigh the disadvantages. However, try to provide more specific examples to make your argument stronger. This will help in achieving higher clarity and relevance.

coherence cohesion

Your essay has a logical flow, and paragraphs are logically structured. Ensure to proofread your work to avoid minor grammatical errors and awkward phrasing. Improving sentence variety and complexity can also enhance readability.

coherence cohesion

Your introduction and conclusion effectively frame the discussion, providing a clear start and end to your argument.

task achievement

You have presented some valid points both in favor and against home education, which adds depth to your analysis.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
33
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

282 words

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In some countries, there has been an increase in the number of parents who are choosing to educate their children themselves at home instead of sending them school. Do the advantages of home education outweigh the disadvantages?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

some people think that men and women have diffeent qualities ,therefore certain jobs are suitable for men and others for women . To what extend do you agree or disagree?

The diagram illutrates the process of dough production. Summarize the information in 150 words.

Friendships that take place online are not as meaningful as those where people meet each other face to face. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Dietry experts agree that many people have unhealthy diets. What do you think are the causes of this? What solutions can you suggest?

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.