Studies have shown that many criminals have a low level of education. For this reason, some people believe that the best way to reduce crime is to educate people in prison, so that they can get a job when they leave. Do you agree or disagree?
A group of
people
believe that the best option to reduce crime is to educate prisoners in prison
. Because the researcher's results have illustrated that many criminals have a low degree of education
. I completely agree with these thoughts.
On the one hand, teaching people
for a job or something is not strange in prison
. But
educating Correct word choice
However
people
in jail has a number of disadvantageous sides. Take escape from prison
as an example. Firstly
, they are planning to leave the prison
as a good prison
student. Previously in a prison
break, they were thinking deeply and creating a team. As a result
, they may be free. This
can lead to other crimes. Then
, they want to do other crimes also
that
Correct word choice
which
I
mean that knowledge is power.
Correct pronoun usage
apply
On the other hand
, receiving an education
as a prisoner has many advantages. For instance
, they can get a job when they leave. All types of people
have a passion for something. Take teaching, fixing something, managing or organizing as an example. In prison
, they take a test. These tests about
how to find the Add a missing verb
are about
people
's interests or passions. Also
, one of the most useful sides of receiving an education
for criminals that
I mean Add a missing verb
is that
this
education
will be definitely free. All of the money is covered by the country's government. Nowadays, all of the best opportunities are in prison
. If they want to study, they have more chances to get an education
in which fields they want to receive. As a result
, they can get knowledge at least or get a job when they leave.
In conclusion, some people
think to educate
Change preposition
that educating
people
in prison
that
can lead to reduced crime. In my opinion, educating Correct pronoun usage
apply
people
is the best option to reduce crime.Submitted by omondavlat91 on
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coherence cohesion
Make sure to clearly outline your main points in the introductory paragraph to provide a roadmap for your essay. This helps in creating a logical structure.
coherence cohesion
Work on ensuring that each paragraph has a single main idea, and use clear topic sentences to introduce these ideas. This will improve the coherence and cohesion of your essay.
task achievement
Provide specific examples to support your points. This will not only provide clarity but also strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
Pay close attention to the logical flow of your ideas. Ensure that each paragraph logically follows from the previous one, and use transitional words and phrases for better cohesion.
task achievement
Make sure to fully develop each idea with explanations and examples. Avoid vague statements and ensure that each point is thorough and well-reasoned.
task achievement
You have made a clear stance on the topic in your introduction, which sets a good foundation for your essay.
relevant specific examples
The idea of testing prisoners to find their interests and passions is a good example that demonstrates how education can be beneficial for them.
introduction conclusion present
The essay concludes with a clear statement of your opinion, which aligns well with the introduction.
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