IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

your local newspaper is holding a competition to find a person who has done the most to help the local community. Write a letter to the editor of the newspaper. in your letter name and describe the person you think should win say how you know this person explain how this person has helped the local community

#newspaper #competition #person #community #editor #name
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I am writing to express my admiration and support for a remarkable individual,
Ms
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. Jane
Thompson
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, whom I believe is the quintessential candidate for your recent competition recognizing individuals who have made significant contributions to our society.
Ms
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.
Thompson
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, a local
school
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 teacher, has been an instrumental figure in fostering educational development and
community
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 engagement in our area. I first encountered
Ms
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.
Thompson
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 five years ago when she initiated the 'Young Innovators' program at the Lincoln Elementary
School
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.
This
Linking Words
 initiative not only improved the academic performance of the students but
also
Linking Words
 encouraged them to apply their learning in practical,
community
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-focused projects. Under her guidance, students have developed small-scale environmental projects,
such
Linking Words
 as
community
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 gardens and recycling drives, which have substantially benefitted both the
school
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 and the wider
community
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.
Ms
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.
Thompson
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's dedication goes beyond the classroom. She volunteers at the local
community
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center
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centre
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, where she organizes after-
school
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 tutoring and mentoring programs. Her tireless efforts have dramatically decreased high
school
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 dropout rates and have provided numerous students with the skills and confidence needed to succeed in their future
endeavors
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endeavours
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. In summary,
Ms
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.
Thompson
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's unwavering commitment to education and
community
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 service has left an indelible mark on our society. Her innovative approaches and compassionate leadership have not only transformed the educational landscape but have
also
Linking Words
 inspired countless individuals to become active, caring members of society. Yours sincerely,
yesat
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yeast
 colder
Submitted by henikeassociates on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea. For example, you could separate the details about 'Young Innovators' and the community center into two distinct paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
You have a clear and logical structure, making your letter easy to follow.
coherence cohesion
The greeting and closing are appropriately polite and formal.
task achievement
You have addressed all parts of the prompt comprehensively.
task achievement
The writing tone is very suitable for this type of formal letter.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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