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Many children these days have an unhealthy lifestyle. Both school and parents are responsible for solving this problem. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

#children #lifestyle #school #parents
An optimal lifestyle is crucial in
regards
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regard
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 to the growth of
child
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the child
a child
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. Particularly, the
child
's
muscles
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muscle
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 transformation needs healthy ingredients to be well-built.
However
, lots of
children
 do not prefer to eat
a nutritious
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nutritious food
a portion of nutritious food
show examples
food
. Because of
this
, I wholeheartedly agree that it is a mutual responsibility of both
parents
 and school to prioritize providing
a nourishing
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nourishing food
a portion of nourishing food
show examples
food
 for the
children
. I believe that
an
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apply
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unhealthy cuisine may have detrimental effects on the
child
's constitution. In my point of view, the
parents
 shoulder
an
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the
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 utmost authority in
provision
Correct article usage
the provision
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 of
a
Remove the article
apply
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healthy
food
 for
the
Change the word
their
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children
. Particularly, the
child
's mother should choose healthy ingredients
while
 preparing the
food
. These ingredients play a vital role in keeping the
child
 fit. On the one hand, a
strongly-shaped
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strongly shaped
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 physique has a powerful immune system that keeps the body safe.
On the other hand
, hazardous components in
food
 have
their
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apply
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dangerous effects on the
child
's health like fats and sugary sweets.
For example
, many fathers and mothers do not care about what their
children
 eat like
a junk
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junk food
a portion of junk food
show examples
food
. So, it is a massive duty of the
parents
 to limit
the
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apply
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fast
food
 to put their daughters and sons on a nutritious track. Parallelly, the educational institutions develop strong-charactered students, they should
also
 seek the environment where the
children
 find
a delicious, healthy
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delicious, healthy food
a portion of delicious, healthy food
show examples
food
. Because of
this
, I would recommend
for
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that
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 the schools
to
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apply
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avoid harmful snacks and
food
 from their canteen and replace them with vegetables, and fruits. They should
also
 limit any kind of
food
 causing
sugar
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a sugar
show examples
 rush for the
children
 like chocolate and sweets. It would be preferred if they put district regulations regarding
to
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apply
show examples
this
 point.
However
, evaluating rules is not enough to spread a
well-healthy
Correct your spelling
healthy
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 awareness among the students. It would be better to assist with extra sessions, and clubs to give them instructions and
advices
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advice
pieces of advice
bits of advice
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 about what they should have for their nutritious meals. In conclusion, one of the most important
parents
' responsibilities is to care for their
children
's health.
Moreover
, the main rule of the educational institutions is to keep the students fit. So, it's a common responsibility for both of them.
Submitted by Mido  on

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task achievement
Provide more specific examples to strengthen your arguments and illustrate your points effectively. For instance, you can mention specific programs or initiatives that schools could implement to promote healthy eating.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph flows smoothly into the next by providing clear transitions. This can help improve the overall coherence and cohesion of your essay.
coherence cohesion
While you have a clear structure, ensure each paragraph has a single main point that is fully developed. Avoid introducing multiple new ideas within the same paragraph.
introduction conclusion present
The introduction is clear and sets the context for the essay effectively, outlining the main argument.
introduction conclusion present
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and reiterates the shared responsibility between parents and schools.
clear comprehensive ideas
Your ideas are clear and comprehensive, demonstrating a solid understanding of the topic.
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