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Writing Samples
Band 7

The graph below shows the consumption of fish and some different kinds of meat in a European country between 1979 and 2004. Summarise the infomation by selecting and reporting the main features, and make compasions where relevant. Wirte at least 150 words.

The graph below shows the consumption of fish and some different kinds of meat in a European country between 1979 and 2004. Summarise the infomation by selecting and reporting the main features, and make compasions where relevant. Wirte at least 150 words.
#consumption #fish #kinds #meat #european #country #summarise #infomation #features #compasions #wirte
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The diagram indicates the trend of different kinds of
meat
Use synonyms
consumption
Use synonyms
 with grams per person per week in European countries from 1979 to 2004. The graph shows us that
chicken
Use synonyms
 is the top
meat
Use synonyms
consumption
Use synonyms
 category compared with others. As the picture,
although
Linking Words
beef
Use synonyms
 was
the
Change preposition
at the
show examples
 top of
meat
Use synonyms
consumption
Use synonyms
 in 1979,
but
Remove the conjunction
apply
show examples
it
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
dropped gradually. We can find out that in
this
Linking Words
 period, people were going to reduce
beef
Use synonyms
consumption
Use synonyms
.
In contrast
Linking Words
, the figure for
consumption
Use synonyms
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
 grams per person of
chicken
Use synonyms
 was 150g and steadily increased to around 250g in 2004.
Additionally
Linking Words
,
chicken
Use synonyms
 surpassed
beef
Use synonyms
 in 1989. In the other category — Lamb, it was
second
Correct article usage
the second
show examples
 high
consumption
Use synonyms
 for the
meet
Correct your spelling
meat
show examples
 category, but it decreased dramatically between 1979 and 1984,
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
 as
beef
Use synonyms
. The
last
Linking Words
, compared with other
meat
Use synonyms
 trends, fish stabilized from 1979 to 2004, with the grams kept at approximately 50.
To sum up
Linking Words
, the
meat
Use synonyms
consumption
Use synonyms
 in European countries,
chicken
Use synonyms
 changed a lot between 1979 and 2004, and fish remained steady.
Submitted by CheeseCiao on

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Vocabulary: Replace the words meat, consumption, chicken, beef with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "compared" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
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