some people believe that it is good for country's culture to import foreign movies and tv programmes.Others think that is better to produce these locally.Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

This
is
a
Change the article
apply
show examples
controversial whether
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
people should be
learnt
Verb problem
exposed
show examples
to overseas
entertainments
Fix the agreement mistake
entertainment
show examples
,but it
also
is manufactured locally.In my
opinon
Correct your spelling
opinion
,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
would discuss to negative effects of unsuitable culture and agree with
benefits
Correct article usage
the benefits
show examples
of national products,as it might reduce
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
fees and preserve the experience. First of all,
it is clear that
international
produce
Replace the word
products
show examples
,
such
as movies and podcasts,can lead to local residents
been
Wrong verb form
being
show examples
damaged extremely.Like many meaningful stories from aboard
seem
Correct subject-verb agreement
seems
show examples
to be unsuitable individual's interests.
As a result
,a range of citizens would put off following
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the entertainment
as well as
disappointed with these products
while
useful lessons are developed into plots.
For example
,the elderly who lack
of
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
smart thinking can not accept
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
modernized ones
felt
Wrong verb form
feel
show examples
bored when they
watching to
Wrong verb form
watch
show examples
movies to kill
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
their time.
In contrast
,these local products have
been play
Wrong verb form
played
show examples
a vital role
to preserve
Change preposition
in preserving
show examples
original knowledge.
Therefore
,having invested to manufacture in education,children
also
understand
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
meaningful lessons and continually it in the future.
Moreover
,the next generation over
long
Add an article
a long
show examples
period would have learned
this
without disrupting
from
Change preposition
apply
show examples
international information.
Furthermore
,a large of
finace
Correct your spelling
finance
could be saved in the
stragative
Correct your spelling
stargate
development of entertainment.
This
Change the determiner
These
show examples
authorities have a chance to allocate
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
their money to develop
Correct article usage
the movie's
show examples
movie's
Change noun form
movie
show examples
industry rather than importing it.All in all , a variety of
promotion
Fix the agreement mistake
promotions
show examples
for local directors
increase
Fix the infinitive
to increase
show examples
their benefits
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
it would be useful
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
future
Correct article usage
the future
show examples
. In conclusion , it is not a good point to pay attention to overseas movies and
programme
Correct your spelling
programs
show examples
due to
unsuitable
mindet
Correct your spelling
mindsets
and governments need to improve their
produce
Replace the word
production
show examples
by developing
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
education and
movie's
Change noun form
movie
show examples
manufactures
Correct your spelling
manufacturers
show examples
.
Submitted by [email protected] on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

general
Try to avoid simple grammatical errors and focus on sentence structure. For example, 'This is a controversial whether that people should be learnt to overseas entertainments.' can be improved to 'There is a controversy over whether people should be exposed to foreign entertainment.'
task achievement
Ensure your introduction clearly states both views. This will help frame the body paragraphs better and make your argument clearer.
task achievement
Include examples that are specific and directly tied to your points. For example, instead of a vague reference to 'meaningful stories from aboard', cite a specific film or TV show to make your argument stronger.
coherence cohesion
Improve paragraph transitions to ensure smooth flow of ideas. Use linking words and phrases such as 'Moreover', 'In addition', or 'On the other hand' to enhance coherence.
coherence cohesion
Your conclusion should succinctly summarize your main points and restate your opinion. Ensure it leaves a clear, lasting impression on the reader.
general
Your essay attempts to cover both sides of the argument, which is important for a balanced analysis.
general
You have a clear viewpoint and you are dedicated to supporting it, which demonstrates strong task engagement.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

Practice speaking step by step, answer real-life questions, and build your confidence. Start your free trial and improve your speaking skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • cultural exchange
  • enriches
  • diverse perspectives
  • storytelling methods
  • spur creativity
  • innovation
  • genres
  • styles
  • over-reliance
  • undermine
  • overshadow
  • cultural homogenization
  • national identity
  • local talent
  • linguistic relevance
  • relatable
  • accessible
  • domestic audience
  • preserve
  • cultural identity
  • promote
  • balanced approach
  • cultural landscape
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!