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Band 6

You recently organised an all-day meeting for your company, which took place in local hotel. In their feeback, participants at the meeting said that they liked the hotel, but they were unhappy about the food that was served for lunch.

#company #place #hotel #feeback #participants #food #lunch
Dear Sir Madam, I am writing to you to give feedback about your hotel that I had organized an all-day meeting
last
 weekend.
Firstly
, the participants were satisfied with the room service because the staff members were professionals.
Besides
, the receptionists were extremely helpful and well-behaved.
Moreover
, I want to thank you for the pleasant arrangements and decoration in the conference room. On the flip side, the main dishes were fairly good, the salad and dessert were disasters, ice cream was molten.
Furthermore
, the vegetables in the salad were neither clean nor fresh. I believe the food in the previous meetings was much better than
this
 time. In order to enhance the service in the hotel’s restaurant, I think it would be great if the kitchen assistants could ensure the cleanliness and freshness of the food.
Furthermore
, it would be better to hire more professional cooks and food specialists. I hope you will consider my feedback. I look forward to carrying out more meetings in your hotel in the future. Best regards, Rohila
Submitted by rohilaimronshoeva1 on

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task achievement
To improve the task response, include more specific examples of the food issues encountered during the meeting, such as mentioning specific dishes or the condition of the salad and dessert in greater detail.
coherence cohesion
To further enhance coherence and cohesion, try using a wider range of linking words and phrases to connect your ideas more fluidly. This will help in making your essay read more seamlessly.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are clearly present and effectively framed, providing a good structure to the letter.
coherence cohesion
Main points are well supported, making the feedback clear and understandable, which contributes positively to the overall cohesion of the essay.
task achievement
The essay provides a complete response to the prompt, addressing both the positives and negatives encountered during the meeting. The language used is clear and sufficiently comprehensive.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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