Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more importnant environmental problems. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Due to
human errors, there have been various issues related to environment
and wildlife creatures. Correct article usage
the environment
That is
why, over recent years, more and more people have become interested in preserving the Earth and introduce
the latest solutions to solve these matters. Wrong verb form
introducing
Therefore
, a huge attention is paid to various fields of environmental problems and how to prioritize these issues.
On the one hand, considering the fact that animals and plants make up the vast majority of the Earth’s population, which not only brings nature’s diversity but also
provide
the possibility of living on Correct subject-verb agreement
provides
this
planet is an argument to consider. Thus
, various organisations and activists have spent their money and time on adopting multiple methods to preserve wildlife and plants
speciesChange the noun form
plant
,
and overcome the consequences of Remove the comma
apply
loosing
these creatures as well. Replace the word
losing
For instance
, by destroying green areas, human being
will face climate changes resulting in animals’ extinction, and the shortage of Fix the agreement mistake
beings
natureal
resources, eventually.
Correct your spelling
natural
On the other hand
, other group
of people claim that communities have to focus on more serious environmental topics than Change the wording
groups
animals
and Fix the agreement mistake
animal
plants
losses Change the noun form
plant
such
as global warming which is as important as the first category. Subsequently
, specific systems have developed to manage more fundamental problems related to environment
. In Add an article
the environment
this
case, researchers work on matters, with connection to life on the planet and predict kinds of threats to human existence.
In conclusion, I do belive
that both groups’ statements can be true and essential to guarantee the Correct your spelling
believe
creatures
lives including humans on the Earth by putting efforts to save wildlife and nature Change noun form
creature's
creatures'
in addition
to other environmental matters.Submitted by layakhosroabadi on
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introduction
The introduction provides a good starting point but could be more engaging and specific. Try to introduce the two perspectives more clearly and set the stage for a more detailed discussion.
transitions
The essay occasionally lacks clear transitions between ideas, making it a bit challenging to follow the argument. Using more transitional words and phrases would enhance readability.
evidence
Further develop the main points with additional specific examples and evidence. For instance, elaborate more on how global warming poses a bigger threat and provide statistics or case studies.
sentence structure
Some sentences are grammatically correct but could be more precisely phrased. Work on enhancing sentence structures for better clarity and flow.
conclusion
In the conclusion, restate the main points for emphasis and perhaps offer a recommendation or final thought. This would provide a stronger closing to your essay.
balanced discussion
The essay addresses both views on the topic and provides a balanced discussion.
understanding
Good effort in trying to link the loss of species to broader environmental problems, showing an understanding of the interconnectedness of nature.
consistent conclusion
The conclusion successfully reiterates the main viewpoint and aligns with the arguments presented in the body of the essay.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?