In many countries, governments spend large sums of money on the arts and this is supported by some taxpayers as worthwhile. Others, however, think that this money would be better spent on health and education. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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Art is an expression of one's mind and feelings, it is one of the most important aspects in
people
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

's way of life.
Hence
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, we have witnessed many countries spending huge budgets
in promoting
Change preposition
to promote

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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the
ministry
Capitalize word
Ministry

The word ministry should be capitalized in this context.

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of
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

arts
Capitalize word
Arts

The word arts should be capitalized in this context.

show examples
.
However
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

has caused disagreements amongst citizens, with some
people
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

arguing that
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

money would rather be spent on health and
education
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

. In
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

essay, I will discuss both sides before I give my
opion
Correct your spelling
opinion

If you don’t want opion to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

. On the one hand,
people
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

need to acknowledge that
Correct article usage
the ministry
show examples
Correct article usage
the ministry

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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ministry
Capitalize word
Ministry
show examples
of
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
arts
Capitalize word
Arts

The word arts should be capitalized in this context.

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plays a very crucial role in our daily
living
Replace the word
lives

The word living doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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.
Arts
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

can be expressed in many ways,
for example
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, music, sculpture, dance,
drama
Correct word choice
and drama

It seems that conjunction use may be incorrect here.

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just to
mension
Correct your spelling
mention

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but a few. A lot of
people
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

make a living out of
arts
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

,
for
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

instance
Add a comma
instance,

It appears that you are missing a comma after the introductory phrase for instance. Consider adding a comma.

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there are many musicians who became
millionares
Correct your spelling
millionaires

If you don’t want millionares to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

only by making music.
This
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

shows how
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
arts
Correct article usage
the arts

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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industry has managed to change the lives of
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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ordinary citizens. Moreso, governments earn income at the same when these
artist
Change the determiner
artists

It appears that the plural demonstrative these is modifying the singular noun artist. Consider using a singular demonstrative or a plural noun instead.

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excel in their
endevours
Correct your spelling
endeavours

If you don’t want endevours to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

,
therefore
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

the need for
government
Correct article usage
the government

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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develop
Fix the infinitive
to develop

It seems that the use of particle to may be incorrect here.

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this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

sector
inorder
Correct your spelling
in order

The word inorder doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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to make it sustainable.
On the other hand
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, some
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

argue that it is meaningless to
spent
Change the verb
spend

It appears that the verb spent should be in the base form as part of the to-infinitive following is. Consider changing the verb form.

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money on
leissure
Correct your spelling
leisure

If you don’t want leissure to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

while
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

are lacking
on
Change preposition
in

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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basic health facilities. Misplaced priorities
is
Change the verb form
are

The singular verb is does not appear to agree with the plural subject priorities. Consider changing the verb form for subject-verb agreement.

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when you
spent
Wrong verb form
spend

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb spent. Consider changing it.

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money on pleasure
while
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

some
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

are dying
due to
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

lack
Correct article usage
a lack

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
of medications in the hospitals. It is disheartening to see
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

spending a fortune
of
Change preposition
on

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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luxury
while
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

children are failing to get
proper
Correct article usage
a proper

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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education
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

in schools
due to
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

shortage
Correct article usage
a shortage

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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of books.
However
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, in my opinion, I strongly believe that all
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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three ministries are equally important.
Government
Correct article usage
The government

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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should find ways to strike a balance in promoting
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
arts
Correct article usage
the arts

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
sector, health system and
education
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.
For instance
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, there are certain
childre
Correct your spelling
children

If you don’t want childre to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

who do not need
education
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

to be successful in life, they are good
in
Change preposition
at

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
arts
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

and they need to be facilitated in order to
archieve
Correct your spelling
achieve

If you don’t want archieve to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

their
gooals
Correct your spelling
goals

If you don’t want gooals to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

, so academic
education
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

alon
Correct your spelling
alone

If you don’t want alon to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

will not be enough.
Additionally
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
arts
Fix the agreement mistake
art

It seems that arts may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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can be a good form of healing
to
Change preposition
for

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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certain ailments like depression and stress, some
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

find healing
from
Change preposition
in

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
the works of
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
arts
Fix the agreement mistake
art

It seems that arts may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
. In conclusion, it is evident that governments should work hard to sufficiently facilitate all these three sectors
inorder
Correct your spelling
in order

The word inorder doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

show examples
to rightfully serve the
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.

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coherence cohesion
The essay would benefit from a clearer logical structure. For instance, explicitly stating counterarguments and integrating linking phrases could provide better flow between ideas.
task achievement
While the essay covers both perspectives of the argument, it could be improved by providing more comprehensive and detailed ideas. Expanding on points with additional examples or data would strengthen the response.
task achievement
There are several spelling and grammatical errors (e.g., "opinion," "mension," "inorder," "gooals"). Proofreading and correcting these mistakes would improve clarity and professionalism.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present and effectively summarize the main points of the essay.
task achievement
The essay addresses both sides of the argument and provides a reasonable opinion, showing an understanding of the topic.
task achievement
Overall, the ideas are clear, and the essay covers the requirements of the task, demonstrating comprehension of the topic at hand.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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