IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 3

Diagram showing the structur and use of a simple solar panel

#structur #panel
The given process provides information on how the structure
work
Correct subject-verb agreement
works
show examples
 and
use
Correct article usage
the use
show examples
 of a simple solar
panel
. What
was
Wrong verb form
is
show examples
 notable about the present process which has 2 usages and
structure
Fix the agreement mistake
structures
show examples
after
Change preposition
apply
show examples
all
Correct determiner usage
apply
show examples
. Starting with the structure of the
box
 with a transparent top. Following, the first way
using
Change the verb form
to use
show examples
 is the solar
panel
heat
air
. And the second approach is the solar
panel
 to
heat
water
. Beginning with the first usage of the solar
panel
, it places a transparent top which as soon as is built above the
box
to turn
Change the verb form
turns
show examples
 into a complete solar
panel
. Continuing with, one obvious
ways
Change to a singular noun
way
show examples
 is the way of
heat
air
. At
first,
the cool
air
 is flown into the inlet of the solar
panel
 which
locates
Wrong verb form
is located
show examples
 on the left corner of the
box
. After
that
Add a comma
that,
show examples
 the inlet transports the cool
air
 into the
box
 with
transparent
Correct article usage
a transparent
show examples
 top above.
Finally
, the
air
is come
Wrong verb form
comes
show examples
 outside by outlet. Continuing with another usage of the solar
panel
,
the
Add a missing verb
is the
show examples
 way it is used to
heat
water
. The
different
Replace the word
difference
show examples
 between the solar
panel
 to
heat
air
 and
heat
water
 is that it has a
water
 pipe to transport
water
instead
 of space
such
 as
solar
Correct article usage
a solar
show examples
panel
 to
heat
air
. The steps of operating
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 the same
with
Change preposition
as
show examples
 the
heat
air
 one but the sun
is increase
Change the verb form
increases
show examples
 the temperature to cause a high
heat
 which
made
Wrong verb form
makes
show examples
water
is become
Verb problem
apply
show examples
vaporize.
Finally
, it is come outside by the outlet which is used to transport
water
 out.

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coherence cohesion
The writing should have a brief introductory sentence that clearly outlines what the diagram and the essay are about.
coherence cohesion
The logical flow of ideas from one sentence to the next could be improved. Each step should connect smoothly to the next to form a clear process.
task achievement
Some parts of the description are unclear or confusing. Make sure to clearly describe each part of the structure and its function in simple terms.
task achievement
While the essay attempts to fully describe the process, some key details and steps are either missing or inaccurately described, such as the heating process for water resulting in vaporization.
task achievement
The essay attempts to cover all aspects of the diagram, including both uses of the solar panel.
task achievement
The main points of the process have been outlined, showing an understanding of the solar panel’s structure and usage.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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